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Nick Kristof Didn’t Get My Memo

[ 202 ] February 24, 2017 |
Portrait of me, vacuumslayer

Portrait of me, vacuumslayer

Because here’s article number *mumble mumble mumble thousand mumble testicles* imploring us to cut Trumpkins some slack. For the last time…no.


THIS JUST IN: Flamboyantly Evil Dumpster Fire of a Person Loses Book Deal

[ 280 ] February 20, 2017 |


Milo has lost his book deal and been disinvited to CPAC. Apparently if you’re down for harassment campaigns and doxing and are rabidly misogynistic and transphobic you can still go quite far in this world, but advocating for pedophilia is a bridge too far. And, hey listen, I’m glad folks decided to draw the line somewhere. But this line shoulda been drawn as soon as this Bedazzled young Frankenstein-looking-motherfucker burst onto the scene.

No. No NO NO NO NO NO NO NO. Just Stop with This. Just Stop.

[ 491 ] February 19, 2017 |

If you remember, in the run-up to election day we were subjected to what felt like thousands of gauzy, rose-tinted portraits of Trump voters. I thought that once President Snowflake won I wouldn’t have to read any more. I was wrong. Thanks, New York Times!


Jeffrey Medford, a small-business owner in South Carolina, voted reluctantly for Donald Trump. As a conservative, he felt the need to choose the Republican. But some things are making him feel uncomfortable — parts of Mr. Trump’s travel ban, for example, and the recurring theme of his apparent affinity for Russia.

Mr. Medford should be a natural ally for liberals trying to convince the country that Mr. Trump was a bad choice. But it is not working out that way. Every time Mr. Medford dips into the political debate — either with strangers on Facebook or friends in New York and Los Angeles — he comes away feeling battered by contempt and an attitude of moral superiority.

That poor man. He voted for a fascist and some people acted in a way that was completely commensurate–they crudely expressed their displeasure!

“We’re backed into a corner,” said Mr. Medford, 46, whose business teaches people to be filmmakers. “There are at least some things about Trump I find to be defensible. But they are saying: ‘Agree with us 100 percent or you are morally bankrupt. You’re an idiot if you support any part of Trump.’ ”

He added: “I didn’t choose a side. They put me on one.”

Actually, no. You chose a side when you voted for Trump. You very much chose a side.

Liberals may feel energized by a surge in political activism, and a unified stance against a president they see as irresponsible and even dangerous. But that momentum is provoking an equal and opposite reaction on the right.

But their reaction is more righteous…how?

Protests and righteous indignation on social media and in Hollywood may seem to liberals to be about policy and persuasion.

It’s not. I won’t speak for other libs, but I am not out to persuade Trump voters. Leaving aside how condescending the notion is that Trump voters need to be persuaded, they are not persuadable, period. Secondly, it is not my aim to work with these people; it is my aim to work around them.

He came out a few days before the election. On election night, a friend posted on Facebook, “You are a disgusting human being.”

“They were making me want to support him more with how irrational they were being,” Mr. Youngquist said.

This is the exact reasoning 17-year-old Gamergaters are using for becoming Nazis. (And they are!) These people are not gettable.

Yet many seemingly persuadable conservatives say that liberals are burning bridges rather than building them.

And that’s unreasonable because only liberals have the proud strong backs and buttocks it takes to do the hard work of bridge-building!

“I love Meryl Streep, but you know, she robbed me of that wonderful feeling when I go to the movies to be entertained,” she said. “I told my husband, I said, ‘Ed, we have to be a little more flexible, or we’re going to run out of movies!’ ”

As for the country, she is worried.

“Change doesn’t occur until you hit rock bottom, like an alcoholic, on his knees, begging for help,” she said. “I think we still have farther to go.”

No, we don’t, thanks to voters like you YOU FUCKING IDIOT.

[Great job, vacuumslayer. Now she’s never going to vote for the Democrats she was never going to vote for anyway.]

Revenge-Shopping with Trumpkins

[ 46 ] February 18, 2017 |

Your daily reminder that Trump supporters are the weirdest people on the planet.

Caption This and This and This

[ 72 ] February 17, 2017 |

Today in incomprehensibly bad right-wing cartooning…

One comedian quipped:

But, this is so hilariously bad–why should he have all the fun? Can you top his caption?

Meanwhile, I’m not sure this calls for captioning so much as mind-erasure because I sure wish I could forget how deeply offensive it is.


In GOOD cartooning news, here’s a twitter account that takes Trump’s actual quotes and puts them in the mouth of President Supervillian. The results are pretty awesome.

Happy Friday, everybody.


Trolling Wrapped in Riddling Wrapped in Enigma…ing

[ 55 ] February 17, 2017 |

I’m lucky in that I’m rarely trolled; it just doesn’t happen in any volume or with any frequency. But on rare occasions I get some bizarre, trolly comments in my threads. In my last entry, I posted the art project I collaborated on with my son. I got this comment in response:

BobBobNewhartNewhartSpecial says:

He wanted to do a “craft.” So we did.



I’m sure this is a super-sweet burn; I just can’t figure out precisely what the burn is. Can any of you help? I’m genuinely baffled.

Thursday Night Links

[ 33 ] February 16, 2017 |
Nightmare Golden Freddy

Nightmare Golden Freddy

Revenge of the Turds

[ 123 ] February 12, 2017 |

Evidence is mounting that Stephen Miller was an insufferable steaming pile of turds in high school and college and nobody liked him. Because of this he’s now going to make us all pay.

If you’ve seen Stephen Miller in action recently, you’ll notice he’s still quite turdly, with his cold, dead eyes constantly straying to the teleprompter whenever he does an interview because it’s hard to peddle that much bullshit without the aid of one. He’s a stony-faced liar and I look forward to his being crushed under the weight of his own mendacity.

Nym Change News

[ 87 ] February 8, 2017 |


Hey all, just a quick heads-up: Hubby’s next job is going to be a bit more high-profile so he and I thought it might be a good idea if started using nyms online as opposed to my real name. (I’ve even changed the name of my official site.) From now on–in most places–I’ll be going by “vacuumslayer.” Many of you already know me by this nym so I figure this will be an easy transition. Robert will make the changes the masthead whenever he has a free moment. (EDIT: I see he already has–thanks, Robert!)

So if you see some jerky asshole named “vacuumslayer” posting here and on twitter in the near future, don’t be askeert, it’s just your friendly neighborhood troll, uh, me.

Speaking of trolling, what’s with this guy?:

What Do You Do with Leg of Lamb?

[ 82 ] February 4, 2017 |

Everybody Get Random: Some Wednesday Links

[ 103 ] February 1, 2017 |


Lady Ghostbusters

[ 123 ] January 30, 2017 |

When hub and I were looking for something to watch together yesterday afternoon, he suggested “Lady Ghostbusters,” as he is a normal person and not a garbage manbaby. So we watched it, he just wanting to be entertained for 2 hours, me wanting to love it because it spawned so much ugly backlash. Spoiler alert: I didn’t love it. But I did like it, and that made me really happy.

Here’s what I liked about it:

  • It solidified my opinion that Paul Fieg is probably the most important comedy director working. The man knows funny and he knows how to coax the funniest performances from the funniest actors working today. I don’t find all his movies equally as funny, but anyone who can make put a rat’s nest on the gorgeous Rose Byrne and make her so spectacularly awful and hilarious in “Spy” clearly has a knack for conjuring up great comedy. His casts are as good as they get and I can’t wait to see what he’s going to do next with them. (Full disclosure: my husband loves “The Heat” because “It’s just 2 hours of Melissa McCarthy saying completely horrible things.” True story.)
  • The special effects were gorgeous, as were the sets. The movie just looked great.
  • Lady Ghostbusters normalized…”lady Ghostbusters.” I mean, the idea that the 3 scientists are women feels transgressive for all of 10 minutes and then it’s “Oh, they’re the Ghostbusters. Duh!” Women as ghostbusters? Feels positively ho-hum after this. I love it!!!
  • I love how the movie flipped the script on the “Producers”-esque dumb receptionist–to have Thor doing this 100% deadpan hunky-moron shtick is ballsy and hilarious and it’s one of the movie’s high points.
  • The movie does slap back at the misogyny its mere existence elicited but does so in a mostly-subtle way. I didn’t feel like I was being hit over the head with SJW gospel (even though I am totally cool with SJW gospel).
  • The cast was top notch–I honestly think the movie just would have had to have been comically bad for it have failed comedy treasures Kristen Wiig, Leslie Jones, Kate McKinnon and Melissa McCarthy. These four women are more goddamn funny than any four folks have a right to be. I love ’em. The movie’s worth the price of admission just watch them having fun.  [/fangirl]

So, yes, see “Ghostbusters.” The ladies made the franchise their own and I’d even go so far to as to say it’s funnier than the original (which has aged very poorly).

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