Guy don’t walk on the lot unless he wants to buy

It’s truly shocking that an organization as dedicated to the most scrupulous integritude as FIFA has always been would go along with something like this:

President Trump has revealed that the champions of the Club World Cup won’t be getting the original trophy, because he’s keeping it.

English club Chelsea easily dispatched France’s Paris Saint-Germain in the final of the tournament in New Jersey’s MetLife Stadium on Sunday, with Trump joining the players for the trophy lift—much to their confusion.

It has since been revealed that the intricate prize hoisted aloft by the London club’s captain, Reece James, was a replica because the president of football’s governing body, FIFA, has let Trump use the original as an ornament in the Oval Office. The trophy, crafted in collaboration with Tiffany & Co, features a central disc with three rotating outer rings. It has a 24-carat gold-plated finish and is thought to have cost around $230,000 to make. If FIFA lets Trump keep the orbital award for good, it is likely to end up in the National Archives.

That last sentence is a tribute to the extent to which the respectable media will simply not acknowledge our present reality. Trump is going to steal this trophy, because it was his birthday present, yes precious, because we wants it and we shall keeps it.

I’m too lazy to check, but is Chelsea still owned by a Russian “oligarch,” which is what they call the mob over there? Because that would fit nicely with the rest of this spectacle of shameless corruption on all sides.

Also apparently Trump is considering issuing an executive order to “officially” change the name of “soccer” to “football” for the World Cup, which will be held in the USA, Canada, and Mexico next summer.