Home / General / The Army Protection Racket skit, but 80% less subtle, 100% more stupid

The Army Protection Racket skit, but 80% less subtle, 100% more stupid

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battle tank under blue sky during daytime
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Shortly before AG Garland stepped up to the mic and murmured “I call you out, muthafucka,” the tangerine squeam tried to ask him how many tanks he had.

Just ahead of Mr Garland’s statement, an individual in the former president’s inner circle contacted a DOJ official to send a message from Mr Trump to Mr Garland, The New York Times reported.

Of course. He did.

“The country is on fire,” Mr Trump is quoted as saying, according to the individual with knowledge of the message, according to The Times. “What can I do to reduce the heat?”

Hey, did ya notice the people are angry? Didya? ‘Cos they’re like, really angry. For some reason. They’re really angry up just … huge anger. I just thought I’d mention it. In case you haven’t noticed. What with all the smoke from the country being on fire. Because people are so angry. Now, how can I help you put out these fires that sprang up all ovadaplace, and are totally your fault?

Ah, the spectacle of a big bully swimming in its flop sweat because the first salvo of threats didn’t work, and all it has is … more threats. Also, it’s got to be bigly disappointed that the country isn’t on fire.

S’wonderful.

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