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Rand Paul, International Man of Principle and Integritude

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Photo via Christian Post. http://www.christianpost.com/news/hundreds-of-iowa-pastors-pray-for-born-again-christian-presidential-hopefuls-ted-cruz-rand-paul-100594/
Photo via Christian Post. http://www.christianpost.com/news/hundreds-of-iowa-pastors-pray-for-born-again-christian-presidential-hopefuls-ted-cruz-rand-paul-100594/

Where can we find a political figure as ridiculous as Paul Ryan, who actually conned some people on the left? I KNOW:

Flynn resigned Monday evening amid revelations that he misled Vice President Mike Pence about conversations he had in December with Russia’s ambassador to the US about sanctions placed on Russia. Pence had defended Flynn on television and denied he discussed sanctions after initial reports of the conversations.

And while several other Republican senators have called for investigation of the incident, Paul said it would not make sense to have more investigations, especially of fellow Republicans.

I just don’t think it’s useful to be doing investigation after investigation, particularly of your own party. We’ll never even get started with doing the things we need to do, like repealing Obamacare, if we’re spending our whole time having Republicans investigate Republicans. I think it makes no sense.”

“Performing our oversight role against other Republicans would detract from our effort to take health care from 30 million people because freedom.” Besides, it’s not like this is something serious, like Hillary Clinton’s yoga schedule.

Still, because of his courageous stand against hypothetical drone attacks on white American gun owners, Rand Paul is truly a great and independent civil libertarian.

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  • efgoldman

    How many International Man of Principle and Integritude are you giving out?
    You’re going to have to retire the trophy.

    • erick

      How many Republicans are there in the House and Senate?

      • Colin Day

        241 + 52 = 293.

  • bizarroMike

    Scott, you have to admit that if the voters wanted oversight and good government, they wouldn’t have elected a Republican president and congress.

    Something, something, frog … scorpion … it is my nature.

  • McAllen

    Gotta save time to investigate all those Democratic racists who are trying to keep DeVos from going to school!

    • Hogan

      Holy mother of I can’t even what the fucking DAMN

      • McAllen

        Yeah, like I know right-wing political cartoonists are trash, and McCoy in particular is trash’s trash, but that one really boggles the mind.

      • tsam

        This isn’t the first time Democrats have blocked doors to a public school and it won’t be the last.

        Devos: Billionaire

        Black student in the 1960s: Not a billionaire, but exactly the same, see?

        • Brad Nailer

          As Thomas Frank put it, “Pity the poor billionaire.”

    • delazeur

      Oh. My. God.

      I am so done with Republicans pretending they are the real defenders of civil rights.

      This take on the original painting actually replaced “n*****” with “conservative.” Jesus Christ.

      • Morbo

        On another twitter thread it was pointed out that they did it for Rush when he got kicked off ESPN. So it’s not even original.

      • CP

        Conservatives need to be the bride at every wedding and the corpse at every funeral.

        While a lot of them take a fuzzier view of slavery and segregation than is defensible, I’ve also met a lot of them that view slavery and segregation and say “that’s horrible! Racism is never justified! That’s why I’m so appalled by BLM trying to bring it back, and all those black nationalists who want to enslave white people.”

        Never underestimate the extent to which “it’s all about me” encapsulates the right wing worldview.

        • Ahuitzotl

          the corpse at every funeral

          I’m pretty much good with that part

      • Republicans pretending they are the real defenders of civil rights victims of racism.

        FTFY. (I mean, the other is also true, but this is what the cartoon is saying.)

    • ThresherK (KadeKo)

      That cartoon about the beseiged DeVos has not escaped notice at my new go-to place for all the lowlights of bad political cartoons.

  • brewmn

    Do these people even stop to realize how ridiculous they sound? “We can tolerate any level of criminality, corruption and rank incompetence in government, as long as we’re in charge?”

    And how can the media even treat these people seriously?

    Of course, NPR has been flogging the party line that the Flynn firing is all due to a breach of trust rather than quasi (at best) criminal behavior, so treat them seriously I guess the media will.

    • StellaB

      Well, that’s a reasonable view, if you believe that the Democrats are the essence of evil.

    • kvs

      Well, Rep. Labrador just came to the realization that maybe opposing the Affordable Care Act was about politics not policy. So they might not have all that much self-awareness.

  • Hells Littlest Angel

    What’s the use of investigating any sort of possible crime? I mean, you can’t get someone un-murdered. Time to move on. It’s always time to move on.

    • Derelict

      Gun laws don’t stop guns crimes, so why even have police departments?

  • Steve LaBonne

    Rand is kind of a walking IQ test for brogressives. The more positive their view of him is, the more surely you know they’re idiots.

    • ForkyMcSpoon

      See: Michael Tracey, HAHA Goodman

      ETA: My god, today Tracey’s Twitter is dedicated to defending Flynn

      • Scott Lemieux
        • brewmn

          I love how, in a piece allegedly about how the election wasn’t all about e-mails, he devotes like 80% of his argument to describing how bad the e-mail scandal really was.

  • kvs

    Rand forgot the memo about saying the quiet part loud.

    • Joe_JP

      Yes. Maybe, Graham and McCain can school him on how to appear like “mavericks” while still being Republican tools. You need a certain veneer here, Rand. You are ruining it for the rest of us.

    • CP

      Living in the echo chamber means they’re increasingly unable to tell the quiet from the loud parts. They no longer have any idea what the things are that are acceptable and uncontroversial to say in public, and what the things are that are only okay to say behind closed doors.

      • They no longer have any idea what the things are that are acceptable and uncontroversial to say in public, and what the things are that are only okay to say behind closed doors.

        Does anyone? I mean, I’d love to live in a world where saying what Paul said was actually unacceptable and controversial, but I don’t think I do. Neither this nor any other expression of Republican hypocrisy and naked lust for power is ever actually going to have negative consequences for them, so why shouldn’t they say the quiet parts out loud?

  • gyrfalcon

    Y’know, if we took the first part of Mr. Paul’s statement at face value, it could be considered a call to divest Congress of investigative powers entirely and place them in a different, nonpartisan body. There’s no actual place to [u]put[/u] said body, since the Executive branch is arguably even more partisan than Congress and the Judicial branch really shouldn’t be adding investigation powers to its existing ones. Fortunately, since there’s no chance in h**l that Congress would actually let an outside body investigate it, it’s a moot question.

  • Murc

    You know, Nixon’s shade must be FURIOUS. He must be looking up from whatever cold hell he ended up in, shaking his fist and going “God damn it, you cocksuckers, where was this sort of blind, tribal Republican loyalty forty years ago? I’d have served my full second term!”

    • CP

      To a significant degree, the movement conservative project has been to remodel the entire party, and to quite an extent, the political scene, to the point where another Richard Nixon could sit in the White House, commit all the crimes he committed and then some, and rest assured that he could do so with complete impunity.

      • JMP

        It also helped to tarnish the impeachment process by using a blowjob as a flimsy excuse for a purely political impeachment of a President simply because he’s of the other party. That way, the next guy could come in and shred the constitution by ordering people imprisoned for life without trial, warrantless wiretapping, and fucking torture, and impeachment would still be considered unthinkable.

      • efgoldman

        another Richard Nixon could sit in the White House, commit all the crimes he committed and then some, and rest assured that he could do so with complete impunity.

        But they anticipated 1) A president with at least half a brain; 2) A grasping, venal congress, but not one completely blinded by extremist ideology.

    • Scott Lemieux

      Indeed.

  • DrDick

    Integrity and conservatism cannot coexist.

  • Eric S.

    A part of me, a very small part, wants to say something about refreshing honesty, but I’m too busy choking on the hypocrisy.

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