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The Dark UN Conspiracy Takes Another Hero

[ 98 ] December 4, 2012 |

Thank God (thank HIM!!!!!!!) for Georgia Senate Majority Leader Chip Rogers, who is willing to stand up against Satan’s grand strategy to use his minions (the United Nations) to destroy this great nation through such horrors as urban planning. In October, Rogers led his peers to hear a speaker at the state capitol building railing against the dark conspiracy known as Agenda 21, a nonbinding, voluntary UN action plan in favor of sustainable development. I’ve never heard of such a threat to the United States and God’s plan for us to develop the nation’s resources to generate profits for wealthy white people who can then store their riches offshore in the Cayman Islands.

Satan takes his pound of flesh though (though given Satan’s nefarious agenda, he probably prefers organic, locally-produced flesh. Not to mention a kilogram of flesh instead of a pound) and Rogers is now “resigning” from the Georgia Senate to “spend more time with his family.” Can we Christians take a few minutes away from building more suburban developments in wetlands to rescue our hero? Don’t you know that “spending more time with his family” is a euphemism for “sustainable, walking cities?” My god, there might be black people in those places! And not every store would have a parking lot the size of Rhode Island! Can you imagine the horror? If we don’t save him now, will Satan take him to the never before known 20th Circle of Hell–making him an employee of an NGO working with indigenous people to save their lands from oil development?

Comments (98)

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  1. Isn’t Sen.-elect Ted Cruz an Agenda 21-er too?

    Also, read something today about how Herman Cain could win in a primary challenge in Georgia. How amazing would that be!

    • Erik Loomis says:

      Ted Cruz is going to be a joy in the Senate.

      • Warren Terra says:

        Don’t count on it. I mean, I hope you’re right, but from what I’ve read of him he’s smart, educated, and very, very ambitious – quite possibly enough so to tone down the crazy that’s gotten him this far, in service of his larger goals.

        See also Rand Paul, who has excellent Loonie credentials but seems to be aiming for a long and possibly nondescript career.

        • I don’t like Rand Paul personally, and his philosophy is ugly and downright troubling, like his dad’s. But damn if he’s good for a few things (like his dad) that an ordinary Kentucky Republican certainly wouldn’t be. Jim Bunning wouldn’t have tried to filibuster the PATRIOT Act or opposed the use of force in Libya. Honestly, if Ted Cruz were half as good on civil liberties and foreign policy as Paul fils, he’d exceed my expectations. But in reality, this guy is a careerist Republican pretending to be a Tea Party guy, Marco Rubio redux.

        • STH says:

          He doesn’t seem super-popular with the libertarian crowd–he seems a bit more moderate than this dad. Not that his dad is all that committed of a libertarian. It always amazes me, these “principled” libertarians who want to make abortion illegal. The contradiction never seems to hit them.

  2. c u n d gulag says:

    And here I thought “Hiking the Appalachian trail,” was the new euphamism for having an affair, and had taken the place of ‘wanting to spend more time with his family?”

    So, is it because of an affair?
    Bribery or corruption charges?
    A dead male hooker with this guy’s DNA on body parts where they shouldn’t have his DNA?

    I’ll check in later after I go to the store – I’m all out of popcorn.

  3. This post is all kinds of awesome.

    “Spend more time with his family lawyer.”

  4. Todd says:

    And while we’re at it, what about this other voluntary U.N. resolution regarding Palestine?

    I saw a lot more black delegates voting that day on the floor of the U.N. than I had ever seen there before. I’m not saying “fraud”, I’m just saying I’d never seen some of these people before. Where did they come from, the woods?

    I’d call for a delegate investigation, but who would lead it for us, Susan Rice?

    Never mind.

    • J. Otto Pohl says:

      Well Ghana voted to recognize Palestine as a nonmember state. No African countries voted against it. But, Rwanda did abstain which means that the current efforts in the Senate to cut foreign aid to countries voting for Palestine will not effect them.

      • The current efforts in the Senate aren’t going to effect anyone.

        It’s going to be a big “Why isn’t this working?!?” moment, like the immigrant bashing in 2006, or the Terry Shiavo shirt-waving. It’s a strategic blunder that will only confirm the decline of the Israel lobby, much like the UN vote itself.

    • Warren Terra says:

      Poe’s law in action.

    • I love how only nine countries actually voted against it, but over forty abstained (including the UK). What message does that send, other than, hey, we wish we could vote for Palestine, but we can’t piss off the Americans? It looks like bullying, but even worse, it was toothless bullying. Couldn’t even get them to oppose.

      • Emma in Sydney says:

        I was surprised and pleased that the government of my country, long the US’s most supine, craven and cur-like ally, actually abstained against US wishes. A revolt by the caucus of the Australian Labor Party forced the PM to accept an abstention, lest she lose a vote in caucus and end up with a vote against.
        Baby steps…

  5. J.W. Hamner says:

    So I can see how Agenda 21 could be used for the construction of the NAFTA super highway, but I’m a little confused as to where the Amero will come into play.

    • Erik Loomis says:

      Do you think the people raging against Agenda 21 actually knows what it does?

    • JKTHs says:

      The Amero will be the currency the US government uses to finance it all, and all the country’s elite will quietly switch to it while Bernanke continues to hyperinflate the dollar’s value into the ground.

      • Warren Terra says:

        The sneakiest thing about the current spate of hyperinflation is surely how it doesn’t affect any actual prices.

        • JKTHs says:

          Yes it does. The government lies about inflation plus I think maybe some of the things I buy have gotten more expensive lately.

          • Warren Terra says:

            This is a joke, right?

            • JKTHs says:

              Well yeah, but that’s often what you hear from Paultards/goldbugs/random crotchety conservatives when you hit them with the, ya know, reality aspect of inflation.

            • Cody says:

              It’s disturbing that for an instant, I also thought he was serious.

              But I recognize him from other threads, and I don’t think he’s a complete loon.

              • Malaclypse says:

                There was a while back that Brad Potts was going on about hidden inflation, and Krugman looking at core CPI because he was evil, and hated poor people.

                • JKTHs says:

                  The original and much more long lasting BLS “truthers” are the ones who think the BLS technical changes to the CPI during the 1990s were specifically done to hide the dramatic inflation the government is inflicting upon us.

              • JKTHs says:

                But I recognize him from other threads, and I don’t think he’s a complete loon.

                Don’t be so sure

            • M. Bouffant says:

              A gallon of milk in Calif. has just gone from $2.99 to $3.39. Coffee & peanut butter are up too.

              • Food, like gasoline, is not counted in measures of core inflation because those two commodities are particularly subject to price swings for reasons having nothing to do with the underlying money supply.

                When you’re trying to measure inflation, you have to ask what information you’re looking for. If the question is the bite that prices are taking out of consumers, you look at consumer inflation, which includes food and gas. But if you want to look at the money supply and help guide monetary and fiscal policy, you look at core inflation.

              • Warren Terra says:

                I don’t buy enough milk to really notice, and I’m not very price-sensitive on milk. I shop around with great care for most of my groceries, though, and so I can say with great certainty that over the last fifteen years list prices on many items have gone up (especially on soda, recently), but sale prices have only gone up – at most – perhaps twenty to thirty percent over that whole time, less on most items, and really not at all noticeably in the last few years.

          • Major Kong says:

            So how come when houses go up in value it’s “a great real estate market” and not “inflation”?

            • BigHank53 says:

              Somebody gets to charge you 6% interest on all the money you have to borrow to buy that more expensive house. Guess who that is…

            • Housing costs are included in inflation measures.

              I would guess that we don’t use the term “housing inflation” in common parlance because “inflation” means “bad,” and when it comes to housing (but not lumber, peanut butter, or cars) many ordinary people own homes and can make money from a rising housing market.

    • Bill Murray says:

      Isn’t the Amero Obama’s Chevy replacement for the Camaro? Thus, the mero will be the official vehicle for driving the NAFTA superhighway.

  6. thusbloggedanderson says:

    In related news, the UN plot to protect the disabled has been rejected by the vigilance of Senate Republicans, defending liberty against its disabled enemies!

    As the parent of a disabled child myself, I confess to some curiosity what Sarah Palin said about this treaty, but I might lose my lunch if I googled that up.

  7. J. Otto Pohl says:

    I just finished copy editing a report for a UN agency. Initially I volunteered to do it for $1000, but they told me they could not pay me that little and had to pay me $1500. The report was on local governance (municipalities) so it was sort of distantly related to urban planning. I am sure you will now all become radically anti-UN now that you know I do contract work for them.

  8. Davis X. Machina says:

    Don’t forget the manatees. Everyone’s got their eye on the laser-equipped dolphins, while the manatees are the real threat.

  9. Joe says:

    Meanwhile, in evil UN action and true patriots preventing it …

    Damn disabled!

  10. Stiv says:

    Hard to fathom, but he’s resigned his seat to go work for georgia public broadcasting. I can’t believe these guys, now hes also disavowing the agenda 21 seminar, says “don’t shoot me , I’m, only the messenger”.

    Takes his policy positions advice from Mitt.

    • Halloween Jack says:

      Really? If he thinks that Agenda 21 is some scary liberal shit, wait until he arrives at Comrade Keillor’s re-education camp at Lake Wobegon for “management orientation”.

    • Matt says:

      He’s been recruited by Mittens for a top-sekrit suicide mission against Big Bird.

    • jackd says:

      There was an interview with Rogers on the Atlanta public radio station this week. The way he described his new position is so vague – no definite duties or functions, pay not settled – that I really had to wonder what’s going on. My guess is that he got offered a choice between this yet-to-be-defined job and something worse, i.e. getting kicked out of the state senate leadership altogether. Or maybe he called in some favors after seeing the handwriting on the wall.

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