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DISBELIEF!

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Copyright (c) 1980, 1982, 2006, 2012 Sekocom, Inc. All rights reserved.
DISBELIEF! is a registered trademark of Sekocom, Inc.
Revision 23 / Serial number 8940729

West of Apartment Complex

You are standing in an open field west of a white apartment complex, with a boarded front door. There is a small mailbox here.

> e

The door is locked. There is evidently no key.

> kick down door

You are in the kitchen of the white townhouse. A table seems to have been used recently for the preparation of food. A television tuned to CNN sits upon it. A passage leads to the west, and a dark staircase can be seen leading downward. The President is Black. To the east is a small window which is open.

> wait what?

You are in the kitchen of the white townhouse. A table seems—

> no president part

The President is Black.

> GET THE FUCK OUT

You are standing in an open field west of a white apartment complex, with a kicked-in front door. There is a small mailbox here.

> check mail

There are two envelopes in the mailbox. The first is from a woman whose name you do not recognize. The second is from the DMV.

> open dmv

The registration on a vehicle is about to expire. Its owner has three weeks to provide evidence of liability insurance.

> look year

I don’t understand.

> year on registration

The registration of the vehicle will not be renewed for 2013 unless its owner—

> it is 2012

The registration of the vehicle will not be renewed for 2013 unless its owner—

> so year is 2012

You are a genius.

> how black president

He was elected in 2008.

> WHAT THE FUCK

You are standing in an open field west of a white apartment complex, with a kicked-in front door. There is a small mailbox here. There are two envelopes in the mailbox. The first is from a woman whose name you do not recognize. The second is from the DMV.

> AND PRESIDENT

The President is still Black.

> open woman

That would be wrong.

> open LETTER FROM woman

You open the letter from a woman whose name you do not recognize.

> where she from

The address of origin is Houston, Texas.

> so america

You are a genius.

> so america 2012 black president

You are hyperventilating. The letter from the DMV can be used as a bag. Breathe deeply into the letter and exhale slowly—

> WHERE AM I

You are standing in an open field west of a white apartment complex, with a kicked-in front door. There is a small mailbox here.

> HOW I GET HERE

You started paying attention. Your breathing seems to be increasingly shallow. You should consider seeking medical attention.

> no insurance

As of today your status as an American citizen guarantees you the right to purchase affordable insurance.

> i have dick cancer

Preexisting conditions cannot prevent you from acquiring affordable insurance.

> COMMUNIST

You cannot change your guild alliegance at this time. Nor would you want to.

> WHERE IS FREEDOM

You are standing in an open field west of a white apartment complex, with a kicked-in front door. You are free to go in any direction you choose.

> up

You cannot fly.

> THOUGHT I HAD FREEDOM

Fine. You fly fifteen feet up in the air. You are now flying above an open field west of a white apartment complex with a kicked-in front door.

> FLY TO AMERICA

You are already in America.

> FLY FREE ENTERPRISE

I don’t understand that.

> FLY CAPITALISM JUSTICE LIBERTY

That just doesn’t make any sense.

> FLY WHITE PRESIDENT

Mission accomplished.

> what

Never mind. You are still flying fifteen feet above a field west of a white apartment complex with a kicked-in front door.

> down

Really?

> DOWN

You plummet fifteen feet into a field west of a white apartment complex with a kicked-in front door. Your legs are broken.

> e

Your legs are broken.

> crawl e

You crawl into the kitchen of the white apartment. A table seems to have been used recently for the preparation of food. A television tuned to CNN sits upon it. A passage leads to the west, and a dark staircase can be seen leading downward.

> watch CNN

CNN announces that the Republican Chief Justice of the Supreme Court declares that you do not have the right to purchase affordable healthcare anymore.

> FUCK YEAH AMERICA FREEDOM

CNN now announces that CNN was wrong. You do have the right to purchase affordable healthcare after all.

> GET THE FUCK OUT

Your legs are still broken.

> crawl the fuck out

You crawl into the passage leading to the west. From your position you can hear the lamentations of conservatives who can now purchase affordable healthcare even if they have dick cancer. To the west is a dark staircase leading downward.

> crawl e

You crawl toward the dark staircase leading downward.

> CRAWL E

You descend the dark staircase. It is pitch black. You are likely to be eaten by a grue.

> WHAT

You continue down the staircase.

> FREEDOM AMERICA FLYING WHITE PRESIDENT

He cannot save you from a grue. It is pitch black. You are likely to be eaten by a grue.

> SAVE ME

Fine. You die of dick cancer before the grue can eat you. You are lucky not to have had access to affordable health care or you would have made horrible gurgling noises as you were crushed by its fearsome jaws.

> THANK YOU

Shut up. You’re dead.

> WAS TALKING TO DICK CANCER

Of course you were.

[Previous installments of Sekocom, Inc. games include DISADVENTURE!, DISADDENDUM!, DISMORALIZED!, DISINSOMNIA!, WHARTON!, and GRADING!.]

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