Home / General / Won’t Someone Think of the Anal Bleeding? (Also: Football)

Won’t Someone Think of the Anal Bleeding? (Also: Football)

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I hear there was a sportball game this weekend. Some birds won the game, some horses lost.

How do you think I feel? Betrayed, bewildered...
What do you mean The Steelers aren’t playing?
Offwrists! Totally a signal!
Who’s winning? Who cares? Let’s all watch me be cute!
I mean LOOK. LOOK AT MY CUTENESS. Suck on this, Puppy Bowl.
Screw this game. Somebody bring me an apple juice.

 

If you found this at all cute or funny or heartwarming, let me ruin that good feeling now: read about the lady who insists that you watch “Will and Grace”  while chanting–like a mantra–“BUTTSEX! Anal bleeding! AIDS!”

Wingnuts spend an awful lot of thing thinking about the minutae of anal sex. It’s weird. I don’t mean to suggest that they’re secretly fascinated and/or aroused by the idea of gay anal sex. But I’m not NOT suggesting it.

I apologize for the misleading title of this post. As far as I know  you can get concussions from playing football, but anal-bleeding-related injuries are quite rare.

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