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For those in need of a laugh . . .

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. . . and that would presumably include everyone watching the Ducks’ game tonight, I’d just like to point out that Victor Davis Hanson — one of this site’s great laxatives for writer’s blockage — was awarded a National Humanities Medal today for his “scholarship on civilizations past and present.” As the Preznit explained, Hanson — one assumes by spreading loads of pigshit wherever he goes — “has cultivated the fields of history and brought forth an abundant harvest of wisdom for our times.” (Not surprisingly, my victory in the 2006 VDH Invitational was not acknowledged in the ceremony.)

Next year’s list recipients is widely expected to include Stephen Hayes (for his valuable children’s biography of Dick Cheney; William Kristol (for his keen moral sensitivity to the plight of convicted perjurors); and Jonah Goldberg, whose decades of research on Hillary Clinton’s debt to Mussolini produced a “very serious, thoughtful, argument that has never been made in such detail or with such care.”

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  • mt

    I was pleased that Jeffrey Dahmer was awarded the National Chef’s Medal for the most creative garnish.

  • Incontinentia Buttocks

    Thanks, D, but as an Oklahoma fan, I can assure you that the Ducks loss provided me with all the laughs I’ll need for a good long while!
    Boomer Sooner!

  • Hanson is a tool for sure, but his selction got me interested in the credentials of other Humanities recipients and sure enough there are some real gems:
    Stephen Balch – president of the National Association of Scholars and one-time star of Phi Beta Cons. (a Michael BErubE treatment here.)
    Roger Hertog – “philanthropist” = key funder of neo-con wingnut welfare institutions. One time chairman of the Manhattan Institute
    Richard Pipes (for a moment I thought it was his son Daniel … but Mr. Team B was a work of art in his own right.)
    Ruth Wisse – I have no knowledge of the merits of her work in her field which may be exemplary – but I suspect that the tenor of her WSJ Opinion pieces and Larry Summers defenses contributed mightily to her candidacy.
    Pauline Schulz – Never heard of her? She runs a local museum in Montrose Wyoming focusing on the Salt Creek Oilfield (teapot Dome scandal). just so happens Lynne Cheney is from the area and there is a Lynne Cheney room at the museum. And for a quick trip down memory lane when Monica Rocked Our World – she is quoted in ths egregious piece of crap from the NYT (Site of Earlier Scandal Frets Over Faded Luster) comparing Teapot & Monica.

    ”The scandal today isn’t nothing compared to Teapot Dome,” Pauline Schultz insisted, at her local history museum. ”It was President Harding, Cabinet Secretaries, there were many, many dignitaries involved.”
    Mrs. Schultz deflected conversation about Harding’s long string of mistresses. She said she was unaware of new scholarship that places Nan Britton, the former campaign volunteer, in the White House for secret liaisons with Harding.
    On one museum wall, the 83-year-old museum curator has posted a jazz-age photograph of herself posing coyly, draped only in the pelt of a mountain lion. Despite this whiff of spice, she dismissed sex scandals as second rate. Today, she lectured visitors: ”The Teapot Dome scandal was the largest in the United States. This new one would be second.”

  • Thanks for the research, JP.

  • witless chum

    I wonder how many of the other winners have photos of themselves draped only in the skin of a mountain lion displayed in public?
    So f’in there.

  • d

    That’s quite a find there, JP — I knew Balch, Wisse, and Pipes were equally as deserving as Hanson (which is to say, not), but the Schulz thing . . . wowee.
    She seems quite proud of Teapot Dome. I’m surprised this didn’t earn her a Supreme Court nomination.

  • chowderhead

    bluster leavened with cluelessness? What? If I could write, and I had written that, I would have though I was reveling the truth to the world. “Beans and cheese elements of the earth.” – Exactly.

  • You forgot Judith Regan’s magnum opus, “My Pet Goat-blower.’

  • DocAmazing

    Turns out those Fresno Steamers were marketable items…

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