Meatheads a-beefing

I did not know there was a person called the Liver King until day before yesterday, but based on context I was not overly surprised by the article I read yesterday.

A social media fitness influencer known as the “Liver King” was arrested on Tuesday after posting threatening messages directed to popular podcaster Joe Rogan on social media, according to police.

The Austin Police Department said in a statement that they arrested Brian Johnson after learning that he was traveling to Austin, where Rogan lives, and threatening the highly influential podcaster in a series of videos he posted to Instagram.

Root. For. Injuries.

Why is he called the Liver King? Because he’s one of those cavemen cosplaying stunt diet “nutritional” “supplement” shilling fuckos, naturellement.

The “Liver King’s” videos promote what he describes as the “ancestral lifestyle,” which includes consuming large amounts of raw meat and animal organs, particularly animal liver. His dietary techniques have been criticized by nutritionists for spreading misinformation.

Ah yes, the ancestral lifestyle of living in a modern home, being a fuckwit on the internet by eating lots of meat that has been carefully prepared for safe and easy human consumption, including the way the animal that it came from was bred, hawking liver pills … And then abusing steroids to get that caveman cosplay physique. Meanwhile, cooking food predates homo sapiens, likely because early people noticed fewer people shat themselves to death after they started cooking their food.

But on to this specific display of toxic masculinity. Which really comes across as a pathetic attempt to get clicks by picking a fight with someone far more famous.

The Austin Police Department said in a statement that they arrested Brian Johnson after learning that he was traveling to Austin, where Rogan lives, and threatening the highly influential podcaster in a series of videos he posted to Instagram.

“Joe Rogan, I’m calling you out, my name’s Liver King. Man to man, I’m picking a fight with you,” Johnson said in a video he posted on Monday. “I have no training in jiu-jitsu, you’re a black belt, you should dismantle me. But I’m picking a fight with you. Your rules, I’ll come to you, whenever you’re ready.”

Or maybe he has some sort of Joe Rogan asphyxiation fetish?

“You never come across something like this, willing to die, hoping that you’ll choke me out because that’s a dream come true,” Johnson said.

If he wants to be beaten up an choked out by Rogan I’m sure one of his fans would be happy to shave their head and nod like a credulous ox while doing it.

Or perhaps he is a bit miffed that Rogan called him out for abusing steroids. That was back in 2023, possibly after a class action lawsuit against Johnson had been dropped. However, The Hollywood Reporter notes that Rogan’s comments were mentioned in a recent Netflix movie about this manscaped trash fire. Because of course there’s a movie about him.

Or maybe he ate a bad bull testicle.

At any rate, police contacted Rogan, the bullet-headed asshole who spread anti-trans hate and endorsed tRump 2.0 said he was a-scared, and because Rogan is richer than Johnson, the police arrested Johnson. Who promptly made bail and started yelling into his GoPro again. Although, more circumspectly.

Johnson’s videos feature some of the same rambling syntax that marked his earlier videos and are a bit difficult to follow. But he says, in part: “Some guy thought if you just put him in jail, have the Violent Crimes Division come arrest him for a terroristic threat, the whole time that terroristic threat you thought was a bomb or something, inside that box, it’s actually a present for you and your Mothership colleagues.”

Johnson implies the terroristic threat charge was reduced, and continues: “But I don’t want to give any details, nor any names. That’s how you get ready for a fight. And you thought the videos would stop. But they will never stop … you’ve got an infinite amount of venom, and then we’ll hug and unite … at some point you have to capitulate something. Real tension, real fight.”

Let’s see, Johnson is:

• Fraudulent.
• Incoherent.
• Belligerent.

Holy shit. He’s going to run for president.