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Look at all the white men on the street


Not the Onion:

‘Serial stowaway’ Marilyn Hartman was arrested at Chicago’s O’Hare International Airport on Tuesday after leaving the residential facility where she was being electronically monitored.

The Cook County Sheriff’s Office told CNN in a statement that it was notified that she had left the facility around noon Tuesday, and that electronic monitoring staff immediately began trying to find her location.

“Staff attempted to contact Hartman using the phone built into the device, but Hartman did not answer,” the statement said. “Electronic Monitoring Unit Investigators found that her device indicated she was traveling in the direction of O’Hare International Airport.

“As investigators headed to the airport, the sheriff’s office notified the Chicago Police Department that Hartman appeared to be headed to the airport, according to the statement. Around 1:38 p.m., police were notified that Hartman was close to Terminal 1. . .

Hartman first made national headlines in August 2014, when she was arrested at Los Angeles International Airport for successfully boarding a flight from Mineta San Jose International Airport without a ticket. She pleaded no contest to the charges and was sentenced to probation.

The next day she was rearrested at Los Angeles International Airport.Her streak continued at Sky Harbor Airport in Phoenix. On August 14, Hartman was given a warning for trying to enter a security checkpoint without a ticket. Twelve days later, she was arrested in an airport terminal for criminal trespass.

A day after that, Hartman was again seen loitering around a security checkpoint, Phoenix police said.She was arrested in Florida in 2015. Another arrest followed at O’Hare in 2016 for violating her probation, which forbid her from setting foot on airport property.

She was sentenced to six months of house arrest in a mental health facility for violating court orders to stay away from airports, WBBM reported.

She was then arrested at O’Hare again in January 2018 after British officials had detained her in London. She was charged with one misdemeanor count of trespassing and one felony count of theft after she succeeded in traveling from Chicago to London without a passport or boarding pass. [Ed: Seriously WTF?]

In October 2019, she was arrested after she tried to pass through O’Hare’s security without a boarding pass or identification.WBBM reported that Hartman was released from Cook County Jail and put on home monitoring in March 2020 after being attacked at the jail, and after the coronavirus pandemic became a concern for inmates.

Reporters who have followed her arrests said the success of her evasive maneuvers depends on her ability to blend into a crowd as a seemingly harmless, elderly white woman.

Actually the Onion:

Glenn Greenwald folks:

Hey Glenn, protip: When you troll LGM with your sock puppets, try to change up your prose style a little, because lately you’ve been easier to spot than a bargain-rate hooker on a Rio beach.

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