It’s the end of the quarter — and my academic career for that matter — so I’m finally almost not behind on everything. But even belatedly I must say this: anyone complaining about another opportunity to watch Jesus Shuttlesworth hit an improbable, game-tying shot over the Big Fundamental hates the Miami Heat more than they like basketball.*
Consider this a thread for preemptively venting about tonight’s inevitable Heat victory. I’m not saying they’re going to win — I’m just saying that the Naked Headed Man isn’t going to lose on his home court without leaving more on the floor than his headband. It’s not like he needs it to intimidate opponents in the post:
I barely even had to crop that shot to accentuate the brutal poetry of the post Mr. Naked Headed Man is teaching some tiny Frenchman here. Draw LASERS on their eyes and you’ll see something fairly unremarkable: the tiny Frenchman’s looking at the man he’s defending, but Mr. Naked Headed Man is looking straight through the tiny Frenchman.**
*I’m aware Duncan wasn’t on the floor at that point. But he could’ve been.
**I’d rather not turn a poor kid from Akron into the very obvious WWII metaphor the above implies so I won’t. But the metaphor is there for the taking, so I’ll just say that I’m not sure how much help the Virgin Islands and Argentina can provide the French here.