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Magna Carta and Wingnut Legislation


Three New Hampshire Republicans have proposed an, um, interesting bill:

New Hampshire Republicans are taking textual originalism to a whole new level: three lawmakers have proposed a bill that requires that all legislation find its origin not in the U.S. constitution, but an English document crafted in 1215.

The bill reads:

“All members of the general court proposing bills and resolutions addressing individual rights or liberties shall include a direct quote from the Magna Carta which sets forth the article from which the individual right or liberty is derived,”

Taking a look at the Magna Carta itself
, we can find any number of ways Republicans can marshal it for craziness. For instance,

Heirs may be given in marriage, but not to someone of lower social standing. Before a marriage takes place, it shall be’ made known to the heir’s next-of-kin.

Looks like some anti-miscegenation legislation could be in the future!

Or this:

If a man dies owing money to Jews, his wife may have her dower and pay nothing towards the debt from it. If he leaves children that are under age, their needs may also be provided for on a scale appropriate to the size of his holding of lands. The debt is to be paid out of the residue, reserving the service due to his feudal lords. Debts owed to persons other than Jews are to be dealt with similarly.

Time to reserve the banking industry for good New Hampshire Anglo-Saxon stock if you ask me!

And finally,

Earls and barons shall be fined only by their equals, and in proportion to the gravity of their offence.

Given the well-established fact that corporations are our new aristocracy, it’s clear that we the commoners are banned from attacking them in any way.

It’s so fun, you can do it yourself. It’s not like you are going to come up with potential laws more crazy than Republicans will themselves. And is there any question that Rick Santorum will support this?

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