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Unteachable Moment

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So I spent an entire quarter in the fall of 1999 tryin’ to learn something to future UFC behemoth Brock Lesnar, and this is how he repays the effort:

Ultimate Fighting Championship heavyweight champion and former WWE superstar Brock Lesnar has slammed the Canadian health care system, referring to it as being like a Third World country, in a press conference announcing his return from diverticulitis Wednesday.

Lesnar had felt unwell for some time when he was struck down in a hunting lodge in a location he refused to disclose, only to state it was three hours from the nearest medical facility.

That unnamed medical centre, which is said to have been in Gimli, Man. (population 5797), wasn’t up to the fighter’s standards.

“I love Canada,” said Lesnar. “Some of the best people and best hunting in the world, but I wasn’t in the right facility.”

“They couldn’t do nothing for me,” he added. “It was like I was in a Third World country, I just looked at my wife and she saved my life and I had to get out of there.”

. . . “The only reason I’m mentioning this, I’m mentioning it to the United States of America because President Obama is looking for health care reform and I don’t want it … I’m speaking on behalf of Americans, I’m speaking on behalf of our doctors in the United States that don’t want this to happen and neither do I.”

What’s hilarious about this — aside from the known link between steroid use and perforation in diverticular disease, which I note for no special reason but rather in the way someone might randomly mention odd facts gleaned from Harper’s Index — is Lesnar’s apparent belief that socialized Canadian medicine interferes with the efforts of the private sector to construct Mayo-sized facilities three hours west of places like Gimli, MB.

If Brock Lesnar’s diverticulitis supplies an argument against Candadian health care, Brock Lesnar’s attendance at the University of Minnesota supplies an argument against the Morrill Act of 1862.

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