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Mr. Friedman, my olive tree grove was destroyed by settlers. How do I start a Lexus dealership?

[ 16 ] June 13, 2012 |

This is obviously the greatest Tumblr ever.


Comments (16)

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  1. david mizner says:

    Hehe. That’s in reference to this:

    “When the young women of Egypt need answers, they turn to Tom Friedman”

  2. c u n d gulag says:

    I’d say that before you can start a Lexus dealership, you’d need to drive a cab for years, so that eventually Mr. Friedman can sit in it, and dispense his advice to you in lieu of a tip, which he’ll put on his NY Times expense report anyway, so he can pocket it – because he’s TOM FRIEDMAN, BEYOTCHES! – AND HE CAN, SO SUCK ON THIS!!!

    His advice will be worthless – ’cause he knows jack-sh*t. So, you’ll have to keep driving that cab.

    My advice is – get the tip in advance, then grab his wallet, and drop him off in some really sh*tty neighborhood, so he can interview the people there on how they feel now that the world is flattening, and that’s why they can’t find any jobs – until they tire of him, and decide to find out what he’ll taste like as a kebob.

    His wallet may not have enough for you to start a Lexus dealership, but it should provide you with enough money to start some sort of local business – like “The Demon Cab-drivers Of ___________ Street Company” – where you pick-up wealthy international tourists, who want to talk to cab-drivers to get their opinion, just like their late, disappeared hero, Tom Friedman, and sell them to the kebob makers in the neighborhood.

    Then, from the proceeds from THAT – start your Lexus dealership!

  3. Dirk Gently says:

    That olive grower cum Lexus dealer isn’t thinking Friedmanny enough. She should be using her cell phone to open up a Kickstarter or Kiva account to fund the specialized rapid transit system that’s tailor made for a world that’s getting more flat.

  4. Mao ZeDong says:

    Mr Friedman, I have a plan to use backyard steel mills to propel Chinese development into a Great Leap Forward. How can I purge the government of reactionary bureaucrats who do not share my vision?

  5. David Sucher says:

    I haven’t read Friedman for years — so what sort of crazy things is he saying?

  6. […] Mr. Friedman, my olive tree grove was destroyed by settlers. How do I start a Lexus dealership?: Eri… […]

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