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My LGM Readership, My LGM Readership, Why Hast Thou Forsaken Me?

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I am not really around today–had to prewrite posts because of a high school graduation I have to attend in New York. But I think that’s OK, because I expected you all to fail. You have (pre)-disappointed me. You have not given enough to LGM, by which I mean your entire estate. Given that the only thing that seems to motivate you people is an annual berating, I will do so from the cross in which you have nailed me!

Why are you such failures in life? Why do you not value this site? Why do you want various members of this blog to cry? Why do you support the return of Trump to power? Why are you so selfish as to not give to your personal lords and saviors, by which mean I naturally mean LGM writers?

Get your shit together people. There is one way to maintain both democracy and whatever low standards you have for your own pathetic existence. That is supporting the LGM community through our annual fundraiser? If you don’t support this site, why do you continue to pollute the planet with your worthless existence? My god people, make your life worth living by donating to LGM! Otherwise, why go on living?

Given that I assume most of you want to live for some reason that I can’t quite comprehend, you need to keep this site alive. Otherwise, what is the point of your miserable existence? I can’t really see one.

And if we have raised a gazillion dollars and I don’t know it because I am snoozing through this high school graduation ceremony, well, it’s still not enough.

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