Tucker Carlson furious he no longer wants to have sex with cartoon representations of hard shell candies

Look, say what you will, but Tucker is the only host today who is laser-focused on the material needs of the working class:

Tucker: If you look at him, the orange M&M does appear very anxious. Maybe he doesn’t like all the ugly new shoes he sees around him. Maybe he liked the sexy boots. pic.twitter.com/ePlcMXZJKW— Acyn (@Acyn) January 22, 2022

Our MAGA bingo callers are, among many other things, deeply unwell.

I like the cut of this jib:

.@TuckerCarlson sir I have an offer for you pic.twitter.com/UBeBePe5no— James Medlock (@jdcmedlock) January 22, 2022