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This Changes Everything


A couple of years ago, I was living right outside of DC. Oh, if I only I could go back in time and back to my old haunts so I could vote forThe Cooch. See, now that I know he’s cool, suddenly his batshittery doesn’t seem so unforgivable.

Portrayed by his opponents as a rigid social ideologue, he nevertheless can rap his own rendition of the Sugarhill Gang’s “Rapper’s Delight” and is an unapologetic Monty Python fan.

OMG, no WAY. He likes a rap song that’s about a trillion years old? Well, I’m sold. PLUS, he likes Monty Python? Wowee wow wow. Why, that’s as subversive as liking pizza and puppies.

Folks, send me back to Virginia, I’m voting for The Cooch!!! I don’t care if it’s too late. It’ll be a symbolic vote, a vote of defiance. He’s just so damn cool.

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