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Today In Delicious Attempts By Republicans To Rationalize Losses

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Shorter Colonel Mustard: Liberals are such strange people. We came up with a trivial pseudo-scandal about someone they strongly support on principle, and…they still support her! I can’t explain it. Liberals are so weird I bet they’d support Warren if we could prove that she at one point was un-American enough to use a condiment other than ketchup or Cheez Whiz.

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