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“I want to apologize to Daniel Murphy for being a colossal dick”

[ 22 ] April 4, 2014 |

So said Boomer Esiason in both the opening segment and a pre-taped apology on his radio show today — though not, of course, in those words.

I’m mock-offended, of course, because I’m an overly sensitive Mets fan,

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but in all honesty, Esiason’s apology is one of the most thorough, and seemingly heartfelt, I’ve run across.

“We’re all morons,” he said. “Or do you want big words?”

[ 14 ] April 4, 2014 |

Acclaimed documentary filmmaker Errol Morris diagnosed how we ended up in Iraq with a gesture that’s not the least bit particular to him:

Isn’t that how we

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all gesticulate when talking to people who have worn the same jacket since 1983?

“Sir — sir — sir — please, don’t shoot me!”

[ 60 ] April 4, 2014 |

There is no part of this incident that isn’t entirely kosher.

Just ask any member of law enforcement, you’ll see.

LG&M podcast: Game of Thrones, Season One, Episode Seven — “You Win or You Die”

[ 13 ] April 4, 2014 |

Watch SEK and Steven Attewell discuss the seventh episode of the first season of Game of Thrones below:

Audio available here.

Works Attewell discusses (warning these contain spoilers for all books):

  • Jon VI (institutional politics of the Night’s Watch, Mormont’s vision, the limits of meritocracy)
  • Dany VI (the Varys/Illyrio Conspiracy, assassination attempts, false flag operations, and more)
  • Eddard XII (why both Eddard and Cersei were acting crazy)
  • Eddard XIII (the will, Renly and Littlefinger’s offers, the war was going to happen anyway)
  • Eddard XIV (why paper matters, Littlefinger’s nessun dorma, and more)

Not that men are telling women what they should do with their bodies…

[ 99 ] April 3, 2014 |

…but in response to New York Mets second baseman Daniel Murphy taking three days off to attend the birth of his first child, WFAN radio host and former NFL quarterback Boomer Esiason said that Murphy should’ve forced his wife to have a C-section before Opening Day so he could “get his ass back to work.”

Murphy’s response most likely looked something like this:

The less offensive NYC radio host response was that paternity leave is a “scam,” a “gimmick,” and when a caller tried to say postpartum depression was real, the host shouted him down, yelling “Stop! Stop, stop, stop — no, stop! Don’t bring up postpartum.”

Stay classy, sports radio.

He also checked under the bed and in the closet for monsters, and promised to leave the hall light on until we fell asleep

[ 29 ] April 3, 2014 |

This revelation would’ve blown my mind back in 1992, but as it stands, I’m just glad I got to totally nerd-out on a former president.

Proof that Yankees fans are, in fact, the worst…

[ 72 ] April 1, 2014 |

…and in any language, no less:

That’s from last night’s Angels-Mariners game, and in case your high school Spanish is rusty, this oblivious ass of a Yankee fan is criticizing Cano for leaving the Yankees because — I shit you not – “all you care about is money.”

I bet that guy looks in the mirror every morning and is shocked, yet again, by how much he thinks he resembles a young George Clooney. Such is his capacity for reflection, much less that of the “self” variety.

Arizona police departments didn’t arrest enough people…

[ 13 ] March 31, 2014 |

…so Arizona Republicans decided to gift the prison company that got “shorted” a cool $1 million.

And if you think there’s something wrong with that, you hate freedom.

ALSO: At least New Mexico’s not using excessive force…today.

Just wait until they learn Hebrew and discover that “Adonai” is plural!

[ 156 ] March 28, 2014 |

I know, fish in a barrel and all — but still!

When you call up the Ku Klux Klan, a polite woman answers the phone and says, “Ku Klux Klan, how may I help you?”

[ 108 ] March 27, 2014 |

File under “Things SEK Learned Today.”

At the

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bottom of the article, you can listen to their outgoing voicemail message. It’s well-worth a listen, if I do say so myself.

Also, I know that the idea of SEK calling the KKK basically means that when the inevitable happens, people will be able to say, “He was asking for it.” But you know what? It was worth it.

It was all worth it.

I wish something similar had happened when I was teaching my Doctor Who course

[ 53 ] March 27, 2014 |

You’ll never guess who it is: Professor teaching class on vigilante justice is pepper-sprayed by vigilante seeking justice

But of all the bloggers out there who aren’t me, he ranks high on the list of bloggers-likely-to-be-peppered-sprayed-by-a-troll.

“I’m not dead yet,” insist denizens of the future

[ 63 ] March 26, 2014 |

There are so many science fiction related jokes/dreams-fulfilled related to this story that I don’t even know where to start.

So I’ll leave it up to you.

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