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And You Thought Hiring Jim Zorn Was Dumb!

[ 69 ] February 1, 2014 |

In an attempt to defend his team’s racist nickname, Dan Snyder has hired a p.r. team consisting of 1)Lanny Davis, and 2)several people less respected and more corrupt than Lanny Davis. It’s like, how much more Dan Snyder could this be? None. None more Dan Snyder. As Chait says, bringing George Allen aboard to defend your team’s racist nickname against charges of racism is particularly special. Apparently Zombie James J. Kilpatrpcik was unavailable.

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  1. BigHank53 says:

    On the bright side, it’s finally inspired me to come up with a replacement name for that franchise: the Washington Spirochetes.

  2. Can Mark Penn be far behind?

  3. Anonymous says:

    Raises the question: can Dan Snyder hire anyone who *isn’t* a complete retread?

  4. Jeffrey Kramer says:

    First press conference:

    ARI FLEISCHER: The Washington football team is not named the “Redskins.” People who say that it is simply don’t know the facts.
    GEORGE ALLEN: Can you call a Tonto-type Indian “Macaca,” or only the Apu-type Indian?
    LANNY DAVIS: I want us to have a civil, serious discussion about this, without name-calling, because you know that ugly slurs don’t help the conversation.
    FRANK LUNTZ: Christ I hate myself.

  5. Roger That says:

    Shorter (heh) Dan Snyder: “I’ve heard of that guy!” *opens wallet*

  6. cpinva says:

    dan Snyder is an asshole, has always been an asshole, and most likely will forever remain an asshole. at this point, I’d like to think, if the franchise had remained in the cooke family, the name would already have been changed, gracefully. probably would have been to a couple more superbowls as well. worst thing that ever happened to the team, was being sold to this maroon.

    • Stag Party Palin says:

      Oh yeah. They’d play their games in Fabulous FedEx Stadium, have a quarterback named Bob “Big Chief” Griffin, and Cooke would spend all his time complaining about how everybody moved to Washington because they hate football.

      Still, it would be a step up.

  7. R. Porrofatto says:

    several people less respected and more corrupt than Lanny Davis.

    I knew this was theoretically possible but didn’t think anyone would manage to find three of ‘em for the same team, and yet, there they are! I have to admire Snyder’s casting director. Can’t wait for George Allen to call someone Tonto and then blow the chauffeur, and for Frank Luntz to invent a loaded GOP-ish euphemism for name-changing: Brand Bigotry? Identity theft? Moniker rape?

  8. Davis says:

    At first glance, I thought you were joking about George Allen. I should have known better.

  9. DN says:

    I am so not clicking through to see if you are lying. Lanny Davis just made me have the first healthy laugh in weeks and I don’t want to ruin it.

    DN

  10. Michael Confoy says:

    Calling Lanny Davis corrupt seems to be a little strong to me. If you mean his firm’s representation of unsavory foreign clients recently, that hardly qualifies as corruption. What we see in NJ is corruption.

    • calling all toasters says:

      OK, can we settle for “a vile liar serving murderous dictators”? It’s a mouthful, but such is often the price of precision.

    • Jay B. says:

      He’s utterly corrupt, morally, intellectually and financially. He writes puff pieces for dictators. It might not be illegal, but it’s completely corrupt and an indictment of the revolving door for whores in the DC lobbying/governance complex.

    • Origami Isopod says:

      cor·rupt
      kəˈrəpt/
      adjective
      adjective: corrupt

      1.
      • having or showing a willingness to act dishonestly in return for money or personal gain.

      “unscrupulous logging companies assisted by corrupt officials”

      synonyms: dishonest, unscrupulous, dishonorable, unprincipled, unethical, amoral, untrustworthy, venal, underhanded, double-dealing, fraudulent, bribable, criminal, illegal, unlawful, nefarious; More

      informal: crooked, shady, dirty, sleazy
      “a corrupt official”

      antonyms: honest, law-abiding

      • evil or morally depraved.

      “the play can do no harm since its audience is already corrupt”

      synonyms: immoral, depraved, degenerate, reprobate, vice-ridden, perverted, debauched, dissolute, dissipated, bad, wicked, evil, base, sinful, ungodly, unholy, irreligious, profane, impious, impure; More

      informal: warped

      “a corrupt society”

      antonyms: moral

  11. Matthew Stevens says:

    Too bad Paula Deen, Michael Richards and Don Imus weren’t available.

  12. theod says:

    There are plenty of local DC industries the team could be renamed after: Please join me in voting for one of these: the WASHINGTON

    Corporatists
    Lobbyists
    Scumbags
    Military/Industrial Complexities
    Pentagonistas
    Legislators
    Prostitutes

  13. Mike Schilling says:

    Actually, this proves that Snyder’s a genius. I mean, could you find even one person less respected and more corrupt than Lanny Davis?

  14. Ernest Pikeman says:

    I see the sewer pipes have burst in DC letting all sorts of unspeakables oooze out. Damn you polar vortex!

  15. Burt Harbinson says:

    On a related note, Freedom Industries is going to replace their current CEO with Montgomery Burns.

  16. dommyluc says:

    Hey, I’ve got a great new name for the Washington NFL team:

    The Washington Honkies!

    That’d be some great Karmic payback, wouldn’t it?

  17. laura says:

    To be fair, this sort of thing is right up Lanny Davis’ ally. It’s what he’s there for. But George Allen is such a loud-and-proud racist that consulting with George Allen on a race-related public relations issue is pretty much admitting to your own racism. It’s a dog whistle (albeit to the tiny group of plugged in types who follow this sort of thing.)

    • snarkout says:

      It’s like inviting Alferd Packer to be a guest judge on Iron Chef. I can only assume that Richard Nixon and the ’76 Flyers were booked.

      • joel hanes says:

        Alferd Packer Grill: Serving People Every Day

        Friends of mine got the bumpersticker and put it on the range hood at home to tease their Mom, a delightful lady but notoriously a non-cook.

    • Eli Rabett says:

      Allan’s brother is the GM

    • Breadbaker says:

      I suppose it depends on what you mean by “this sort of thing”. I don’t think there are any examples of Lanny Davis turning back the tide of history.

    • I am not so convinced that hiring George Allen is admitting to racism. I believe it is more to do with Daniel Snyder living in a self-referential bubble. He clearly has an ego the size of a small star system and a thin skin, as evidenced by his ludicrous attempts to sue local newspapers whose writings he does not like. He just seems to me to be..well, unworldly. He appears to have no understanding of how he and his team are perceived in the Real World.

      • laura says:

        Entirely possible. And I doubt Snyder sees himself as a racist (hardly anybody does). But I think hiring George Allen (though to be fair he hasn’t officially hired him just consulted) speaks volumes to a specific group of supporters who see changing the name of the team as just another piece of awful political correctness imposed on them by the liberal elite etc., and is intended to overtly align Snyder with the sort of people who would vote for George Allen.

  18. Rob says:

    The real question is how Dick Morris isn’t involved.

  19. Steve S. says:

    Zorn did roughly as well as any other recent Washington coach.

  20. david says:

    As a life-long Cowboys fan, I would probably switch my allegiance to DC if they changed their name to the Muleskinners (hey, they literally built the damn place) and changed the team song to Muleskinnner Blues. See, you could keep your “‘skins” moniker without much trouble. As Hodgeman says, problem solved and “you’re welcome.”

  21. Uncle Ebeneezer says:

    I guess David Duke wasn’t available?

  22. LosGatosCA says:

    Plus Tom Perkins will be ghost writing all Op Ed pieces to ensure the racist counter messaging resonates with the commoners.

  23. Hurst says:

    I wonder how many people will be fooled into thinking that this is the ex-coach of Washington George Allen, even though he died in 1990.

  24. oldster says:

    You know, at least they could have hired Zombie Lee Atwater, who would have told them:

    “By 1968 you can’t say “redskin”—that hurts you, backfires. So you say stuff like, uh, forced busing, states’ rights, and all that stuff, and you’re getting so abstract.”

    I mean–why turn your back on the Republican party’s long, long history of folk-wisdom about dog-whistles?

  25. Bonnie says:

    I am an American Indian and the name has always offended me. Just for the record, some people knew I was Indian some did not. However, those who did, on some occasions did refer to me as the “R” word. And, believe me, when they did, they did not mean it as a compliment. That’s how I know it is a slur. I have often said that Snyder’s team will never win because of their name. However, just between you and me, I believe they won’t win because Snyder has proven over and over that he knows nothing about how to run a good football program. But, it would still be good if they changed their names.

  26. Greg Bacon says:

    How much better would it be for the ones clamoring for the ‘Redskins’ to change their name went after the Pentagon for naming serious weapons of killing after Native Americans?

    For instance, the Apache helicopter gunship and the Blackhawk helicopter troop carrier?

    And what about the nuclear bomb carrying Tomahawk cruise missile.

    So tell me, which names are truly more offensive in more ways than one?

    • Origami Isopod says:

      Yes, by all means, let’s stop talking about this issue and start talking about your pet ones. Also, presuming you’re white, you most definitely get to tell Native Americans where to focus their energies.

  27. Origami Isopod says:

    Has everyone seen this ad yet? If not, you should.

  28. [...] that has a real impact on the lives of Native Americans. Snyder tried to deflect bad PR by hiring a dream public relations team who apparently advised that he start a charity for Native Americans, called the Original Americans [...]

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