10 Reasons to Donate to LGM

You shouldn’t need actual reasons to donate the vast majority of your assets to LGM. Maybe all of your assets! But here’s 10:

1. Unlike giving your money to Democratic candidates, with LGM you actually get what you pay for.
2. You spoiled Maddie and Connor by sending them to the “best” schools, meaning they never had to struggle for anything, are completely worthless, and probably are doing fentanyl behind the gym anyway. Why would you leave those losers money?
3. I am addicted to free jazz shows and you need to feed me!
4. Only at LGM do you get the objectively correct condiment takes you demand
5. Farley’s bourbon budget supports the state of Kentucky, don’t leave the Commonwealth’s already horrible shitty redneck schools producing little crackers even more dependent on donations from methheads for books, assuming the teachers themselves can read (this goes out to Rob’s sensitivity about Kentucky jokes, which is absolute Loomis Bait)
6. Being Top 100 Political Science Bloggers requires us to dress a certain way and have you seen us? We have very large clothing budgets! Er….our clothing is very large…..
7. Farley is so desperate for money that he still grades AP exams, the worst evaluation of money versus effort an academic can make. Save him!
8. This is one actually serious–there is no one in the entire world who provides you with something like the grave or labor history series that last this long and become this level of information repository connecting the past and present. I’m sorry, you motherfuckers owe me! Ha ha ha ha, always making friends here!
9. LGM writers embody the Protestant work ethic so beloved by people who spend their days fucking around in blog comment sections!
10. Again, what you going to flush your money down the toilet by giving it to Democratic campaigns? If you are going to give it to some D-level consultant, why not give it to us?

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