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A totally new paradigm

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If you like the idea of Bari U, you’ll love Alaska Pacific University!

Why Alaska?

If it’s good enough for airline startup founder Rob McKinney and, uh…Zac Brown, it’s good enough for us.

Our original plan, admittedly, was a school based in Austin, Texas, with a satellite campus in Plano, called “The University of Austin and Plano,” or “Texas A&P,” but recent trends in real estate costs, the broader tax environment, and Anchorage’s geographical distance from the stultifying discursive environment of the lower 48 states all combined to make Alaska the natural home for our endeavor.

Will there be “safe spaces” or “trigger warnings” at The APU?

No. No topics are disallowed and no uncomfortable subjects are off-limits at The APU.

Will The APU promote CRT or BDS?

No, The APU will not allow students or professors to practice the poisonous academic assault on American history known as Critical Race Theory, or to engage in political, cultural, or economic boycotts that unfairly target the only democracy in the Middle East.

You have to admire the principled commitment to free speech! And the culinary program looks great:

While our dining program is still in the earliest planning stages, we are already excited about our commissary’s future offerings, which are being developed in collaboration with Mario Batali and whichever of the Bon Appétit people were objectively the most canceled. Beginning next year, undergraduates at The APU will be able to sign up for our first meal plan, “Forbidden Courses.” Offerings are expected to include unpasteurized cheese, foie gras, long pig, the bird you have to eat with a napkin on your head from movies about rich people, pangolin, European Kinder Surprise Eggs, and purposely inauthentic banh mi.

And the logistics sound airtight:

OK so you’re telling me that you plan to set up an actual four-year degree-granting program that will, like, have a library—a physical one, staffed by librarians and full of books, in a building you will have to build or purchase, along with all the other requisite facilities and staff—and you’re going to do this in like two years, though right now your headquarters exists essentially only on paper and your entire staff is mainly people who post a lot and academics who don’t actually plan to leave their current institutions.

Yes.

How much will it cost to go to this school

We’ll tell you later!

Isn’t there a long history of alternative conservative colleges failing because they can’t attract students, or raise enough money to actually start a college, or the administrators end up alienating faculty? And, really, isn’t it concerning that you didn’t raise the money necessary to start a real college before you announced the project, and that much of your pitch seems to be aimed less at potential students or faculty than at potential funders?

Those who doubt The APU’s commitment, or our intentions, should note that, among our advisers with actual experience in university administration, only one so far has abruptly resigned.

It is very hard to imagine this project not succeeding! Try the Thiel.

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