Texas, where attempted murder is apparently perfectly legal if you do it with an F-150:
Immediately after harassing and running over six cyclists near Houston this past weekend, the teenager behind the wheel of the black truck had one thing on his mind, according to a witness: “Do you think I’m going to jail?” [Good question! –ed]
The answer, as it turned out, was no.
The 16-year-old driver appeared to have been trying to “roll coal” on a group of eight cyclists training for the Ironman Triathlon, according to fellow cyclist Chase Ferrell. Ferrell was a few paces behind the group when the driver blew thick, black smoke on him as he pedaled along Old Highway 290 on Saturday morning. Moments later, the driver caught up to the larger group up ahead and tried doing the same thing.
Only, the second time was different. The driver, instead of blowing smoke on the group, accelerated and slammed into six of the eight cyclists, Ferrell and police say. He stopped, got out and surveyed the wreckage before Ferrell caught up to the scene.
In all, four of the six cyclists who were hit were hospitalized. Two of those had to be airlifted because of the severity of their injuries. Photos shared by Ferrell show a scene from a movie: Heavy damage to the front end of the pickup from its impact with the cyclists. Mangled bicycles strewn about the grassy right of way adjacent to the road. A helicopter ambulance readying for departure.
Within minutes, Ferrell said, the teen’s parents showed up. When the police arrived, he was questioned but ultimately released from the scene without charges.
I assume the police are “investigating” this in the same sense that Joe Rogan is “researching” the safety and effectiveness of the COVID vaccine.
UPDATE: the kid does have “college aspirations,” so let us not bicker over who maliciously ran over who.