Home / General / If You Can’t Stop Taking Julian Assange Seriously After the First Half Hour, You <i>Are</i> the Sucker

If You Can’t Stop Taking Julian Assange Seriously After the First Half Hour, You Are the Sucker



Paranoid anarcho-bros are very upset that Assange made them stay up until 3AM to listen to him plugging some books on their way to joining The Year of Voting Dangerously at remainder tables:

Over the course of two hours Tuesday — with the world’s media and bleary-eyed Trump die-hards across the United States tuning in — Assange and other WikiLeaks officials railed against “neo-McCarthyist hysteria,” blasted the mainstream press, appealed for donations and plugged their books (“40 percent off!”).

But what they didn’t do was provide any new information about Clinton — or about anything else, really.

The much-vaunted news conference, as it turned out, was little more than an extended infomercial for WikiLeaks on the occasion of the 10th anniversary of its founding.


Infowars, the pro-Trump and virulently anti-Clinton media vehicle launched by Texas radio host Alex Jones, had touted the WikiLeaks news conference as “historic” and promised that “the Clintons will be devastated.”

Before Assange took the stage, Jones — who broadcast through the wee hours of the American morning — told viewers and listeners he was so excited he was worried his heart couldn’t stand it.

But by the end, Jones realized he’d been played — or in his words, “#wikirolled.”

He wasn’t the only one. Sleep-deprived Trump backers and Hillary-haters all across the country took to Twitter to convey their displeasure.

EL. OH. EL. I also like this bit:

He said the material would focus on war, weapons, oil, mass surveillance, the technology giant Google and the U.S. election, but declined to give any details.

“There has been a misquoting of me and Wikileaks publications … (suggesting) we intend to harm Hillary Clinton or I intend to harm Hillary Clinton or that I don’t like Hillary Clinton. All those are false,” he said.

Oh, sure, she’s a “demon” who “is going to put nooses around everyone’s necks as soon as she wins the election,” but that doesn’t mean I don’t like her! But, hey, as long as he’s trolling people who expect him to deliver the Whitey Tape he’s welcome to his incoherence.

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