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Send in the clowns

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If you thought the advocates of sham medicine would have the proper sense to avoid offering their services to the Japanese people in their time of distress — well, you would apparently be wrong:

(R)adioactive material carried by wind and air currents may spread contaminated material to neighboring islands and countries. For all concerned, there are protective steps that can be taken with homeopathy. Key remedies that have been used either in research or historically to prevent or treat radiation poisoning include the following: Cadmium iodide; Cadmium-sulph; Phosphorus; Strontium-carbonicum; and X-ray. If at risk of radiation exposure, any one of the above remedies may be taken as an emergency response, three times a day in a 30C potency. Do not exceed 6 doses without guidance from your homeopath.

The last line is especially hilarious, because for chrissakes, we wouldn’t want anyone overdosing on magical homeopathic water.

The folks responsible for the e-mail quoted above — an Australian group called, inexplicably, “Homeopathy Plus” — have helpfully provided the world with a ponderous, gibbering series of dubious claims about the efficacy of various homeopathic remedies for treating the side effects of radiotherapy and chemotherapy (as if there were any meaningful comparison between fractionated, 60 gray blasts of photon beams and, say uncontrolled exposure to Cesium-137.) To their mild credit, our water-bearing friends don’t advise cancer patients to forego treatments that have actually been proven effective. But they do warn that homeopathic remedies are so overwhelmingly powerful that they must be used with caution and proper timing. To wit:

Not only can homeopathy treat many problems, it can also prevent them . . . . For this reason homoeopathic [sic] remedies for chemotherapy and radiotherapy side-effects should not be used AHEAD of treatment as they may also block the cell destroying effects of these approaches. Until more research is available in this area, it would be wise to use homeopathy only as side-effects occur AFTER treatment.

Good to know!

Meantime, over at the Hippie Lancet Huffington Post, someone is reminding us that lots of miso soup and brown rice will surely thwart the effects of radiation poisoning. Also good to know!

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