The Best Man For the Job
Bush’s choice immediately drew plaudits from informed observers. “He will do a terrific job,” said James K. Glassman, syndicated columnist and prescient author of Dow 36,000. “We need some free-enterprise insights if the recounstruction is going to work, and he was one of the first people to recognize the value of my insight that a company could use the same money to pay dividends and invest in future growth.” Glassman also felt that the appointment would help rectify the grievous injustices done to the Fastow family. “As one of my colleagues at Shill Central Station pointed out, it is just unfathomable that a real estate heiress like Lea Fastow was forced to go to prison like a common proletarian, and her experience was miserable. There’s no doubt that the FEMA salary will allow Andy to buy a lot of packs of Camels when his time comes.”
What clinched the deal for Bush, said White House spokesman Scott McClellan, was the impressive resume that Fastow had compiled since leaving Enron. “After the lies spread about Brownie by people who despise this country, we carefully scrutinized the credentials of all viable candidates, and Andy just knocked us out. He has been Assistant Manager of the 3rd largest Carl’s Jr. in
Asked whether Bush was unhappy with Brown’s performance, Bush responded angrily. “We could not have been happier with Brownie’s performance,” said Bush. “Why else would we have awarded him both the Medal of Freedom and the Lionel Chetwynd Award for Outstanding Achievement in the Field of Excellence? It’s just that our relationship with the Ebony Pennin…er, the country we’re sending him to is more important. We have a saying in
(Cross-posted at Majikthise.)