…I thought I’d point out that Lindsey Graham just gave up the game on CNN this afternoon. I’d say something like, “I don’t know what he could’ve been thinking,” but I think it’s pretty clear that he simply just wasn’t.
This episode is notable not only for Steven’s barely contained rage, but because — obviously — is the last Game of Thrones podcast we’ll be doing for nine months.
Have no fear though! We will still be podcasting! Starting this week, we will be hosting a podcast on the new BBC series Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell. We hope those of you who enjoyed listening us talk about one television show adapted from thick novels will join us as we talk about another television show adopted from another thick novel.
Having just written a brief history — since 2008 — of conservatives being sued by musicians for using their work at campaign rallies, I’m thinking of doing them a favor and maybe writing up a list of songs by artists who might allow conservatives to use their work. Currently, I’ve got Kid Rock, Ted Nugent, and Pitbull. Suggestions?
UPDATE: Thanks for all the suggestions! Here’s what I ended up going with.
This is easily the goofiest thing I’ve written in some time, and it may have been for an audience of one — i.e. people who watch as much Fox News as I do and obsess over Game of Thrones — but here you go:
On “Fox & Friends” this morning, co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck was outraged by those criticizing Stannis Baratheon’s decision to sacrifice his daughter, Agamemnon-and-Iphigenia-style, to the Lord of Light. “There’s only one true god and his name is R’hllor,” she said, adding that “it’s a leader’s job to make the difficult decisions, and he should be applauded for doing so.”
“Of course,” co-host Steve Doocy said, “the real issue here is the troops. If Stannis had cut and run, they would have starved, and now they at least have a chance to die brave deaths while laying siege to Winterfell.”
“Some people would rather the troops starve than die honorably,” Hasselbeck said. “If Stannis tried to return to Castle Black, Shireen still might have died, and even if she didn’t, Jon Snow just let a bunch of Wildlings across the border. It’s not like she would have been safe there!”
“I think we should talk about that,” co-host Brian Kilmeade said. “Who is Jon Snow to be offering all these Wildlings amnesty?”
“No one’s talking about the rate of Wildling-on-Wildling crime, either,” Doocy added. “It’s high — much higher than in the White Walker community.”
Kilmeade agreed, arguing that “some critics” are bashing the White Walkers just because they’re white. “We don’t really know anything about them,” he said, “but we do know that, unlike the Wildlings, they’re not using precious resources that could be going to the troops. I’m not saying we should start a #WhiteWalkersMatter campaign or anything, but I’m not saying we shouldn’t either.”
I couldn’t not respond, now could I? This is about ethics in journalism!
…and the results are predictably awful:
Wednesday’s “Fox & Friends” featured the show’s hosts having a conversation with Colin Quinn about Jerry Seinfeld’s recent complaint that political correctness has ruined comedy. Elisabeth Hasselbeck, in particular, didn’t seem to know what comedy even was, asking questions of the sort one would expect from an alien anthropologist who barely passed her required “Human Culture” courses. “Do you feel that you’re being more and more restricted in your art, your profession, and what you do, and your freedom?” she asked, as if she knew those words were related, but only theoretically.That’s because for conservatives like her and her co-hosts, Steve Doocy and Brian Kilmeade, a “sense of humor” isn’t about what’s actually funny, but about what awful thoughts they possess that comedy would provide them the “freedom” to express aloud without facing public opprobrium…
…but this is the best thing ever:
Of course, I’m a confabulist who invents improbable happenings about himself in order to satisfy his insatiable hatted ego, etc. etc. etc.