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Baby, It’s Warm IN MY PANTS

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In this #MeToo moment, some people are listening to the holiday classic “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” with fresh ears.

Some take issue with lyrics that imply that male singer is doing everything but physically barring the female singer from leaving his abode. And while I’d say that’s problematic, it’s not the song’s most glaring problem. The worst, most troubling and retrograde lyrics in the song refer to the woman’s concerns about what people will think about her should she stay. (She seems to want to stay at times!)

The neighbors might think (baby, it’s bad out there)

(My sister will be suspicious) Gosh your lips look delicious
(My brother will be there at the door) Waves upon a tropical shore
(My maiden aunt’s mind is vicious) Gosh your lips are delicious
(But maybe just a cigarette more) Never such a blizzard before

(There’s bound to be talk tomorrow) Think of my life long sorrow
(At least there will be plenty implied) If you caught pneumonia and died
(I really can’t stay) Get over that hold out

That’s an awful lot of talk about what other people will say and think. A decent dude would hear this and say “Listen, I’d love to smash the patriarchy with you down by the fire, but stay or go based on your needs, not the needs of your shitty family and neighbors.” ┬áBut he doesn’t. And that’s what makes the song so vexing.

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