Home / General / Fitbitch

Fitbitch

Comments
/
/
/
1007 Views

At The Federalist Inez Feltscher implores women to “stay fit” for their husbands.

Having been sold a pack of feminist lies that make both men and women unhappier, those of us in the millennial generation who are interested in happy marriages have had to rediscover a lot of politically incorrect truths from scratch.

I hate rediscovering things from scratch.

But there’s one truth that is particularly difficult for our genderless, sexless culture to accept, because it eviscerates not one, but two shibboleths of the age: first, that men and women desire the same things in relationships, and second, that a selfish, “be yourself” attitude is a good prescription for marital bliss.

We live in a culture where a major network features an annual lingerie fashion show and until recently a major fast food chain frequently featured bikini-clad women sloppily eating burgers. We have not reached genderless, sexless nirvana yet near as I can tell.

Also, I’m not sure how being oneself is inherently selfish, and I’m pretty sure being oneself  is actually a pretty good prescription for marital bliss. I waited years to tell my husband I did Juggalo porn* and it didn’t go over sexily.

*Porn, but you’re a Juggalo

 

Terrifying truth number one: a spouse’s looks are much more important to men than women. That men are visual creatures when it comes to picking a mate has been confirmed by brain scans, but any appraisal of the dating scene will lead the average intellectually-honest person to the same conclusion via observation.

 

Terrifying truth number one: a spouse’s looks are much more important to men than women. That men are visual creatures when it comes to picking a mate has been confirmed by brain scans, but any appraisal of the dating scene will lead the average intellectually-honest person to the same conclusion via observation.

Women are no less shallow than men when it comes to sheer attraction, but they are different. Women tend to be turned on by men who display social dominance, power, or the ability to provide more than by hunky looks. The de-emphasis that women place on physical appearance sometimes leads us to project our own attraction patterns onto our spouses: sure, it’s easy for us to imagine still loving our husbands plus 50 pounds, but how easy is it for us to feel as gung-ho about, say, their extended unemployment?

When will this myth that women aren’t visually stimulated die? I’ve written before on the topic, but I feel like I could write until my fingers fell off and people would just be like “Women love dad bod, it’s what Jesus wanted” and then shrug sadly.

I do think that men place a bit more importance on looks than women do, but I’m just gonna lay my cards on the table now and say maybe that–fuck it–maybe it’s time for men to evolve a bit, ya know?

You know that friend who gets you the gift she would have wanted instead of the one you did? That’s an example of this projection. But instead of the pain and confusion that projection causes, what if we women instead embraced the ways our desires differ from our husbands’? There are some responsibilities men have to women and some women have to men. Taking care of yourself is one of those responsibilities.

Men, you can look like a boil on Steve Bannon’s ass and that’s cool as long as you bring home the bacon.

Instead, try shifting your appearance a notch or two up your priorities list. Cultivate an active lifestyle or carve out the time to work out regularly, and curb your caloric indulgences. Wear clothes that flatter you instead of those that are just easiest to reach for. Even in the busiest of schedules, find the five minutes to put on a little lipstick or a spritz of the perfume you used back when the two of you were dating. He’ll appreciate you making the effort.

*Sigh*

There is a Marilyn Monroe quote that frequents social media profiles these days: “if you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve my best.” This sentiment—that if they’re truly in love, men should just put up with any amount of negative behavior and presentation from women without even voicing a complaint—is echoed in romantic Hollywood movies, and dressed up as female liberation from the “male gaze” or the Patriarchy™.

But if you’re truly in love, why would you want to make the man who loves you put up with your worst? Really, it boils down to an ideological, you-go-girl gloss on selfishness.

WHERE CAN I GET “YOU GO GIRL” GLOSS IT SOUNDS AWESOME.

It’s best to make a good-faith effort to stay in shape and keep up your beauty routine for yourself, of course, but if you’re happy in those sweats with the “holiday weight” starting to pile on, do not be afraid to consider your husband’s happiness, and how important your physical appearance might be to him. Making an effort to please the man you married is not an act of sisterhood betrayal. Honoring your husband’s masculine nature—and the desires that come with it—is one of the best gifts you can give the man you love.

I honestly don’t know what to say in this response to this, so I’ll just leave you with this image; it was the ad displayed on the page where this article appeared:

Beautiful young sexy blond girl with a sporty physique slender figure doing yoga exercises fitness in slinky suit meditates relaxes pilates
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Google+
  • Linkedin
  • Pinterest
It is main inner container footer text