Jon Papelbon 2016: A Richly Ironic Tale of When Bad Things Happen to Complete Assholes

For reasons I cannot explain, the Washington Nationals elected not to release Jon Papelbon after he physically assaulted their best player over a trivial PLAYING THE GAME THE RIGHT WAY incident. He rewarded them by pitching himself out of the closer job and then demanding and receiving his release. Which led to this world-class Jon Papelbon anecdote:

Only time I ever covered Papelbon, he walked into the clubhouse, turned off The Doors & put on a song called "Vote For Trump" at max volume

— Kenny Ducey (@KennyDucey) August 13, 2016

Too bad the Nats didn’t cut him in a more timely manner so he could have appeared at the RNC!

There’s an obvious Doors joke here, but I will have to leave it to you because I remain firmly of the belief that evaluated properly as a pop singles band the Doors were perfectly fine.