Home / General / Roses are red, violets are blue. I listened to Ben Carson’s rap ad

Roses are red, violets are blue. I listened to Ben Carson’s rap ad

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And now you must too.

Two thoughts about the ad, which is set to be visited upon released in several urban markets today:

  1. We can put to rest any debate about whether GOP outreach to African-Americans can ever be anything but dreadfully insulting and insultingly dreadful. Really, no one should have asked the question after the “GOP – The Party of Lincoln” ad. But now people caught asking the question will have to listen to Ben Carson’s rap ad, through headphones. Several times.
  2. When presented with a link to something labeled “Ben Carson’s rap ad,” don’t click on the link. It will make you depressed and angry. But you’ve figured that out by now.

 

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  • Warren Terra

    I’m kind of disconnected from youth culture: is Rap Flute a Thing?

    • Lee Rudolph

      There’s no reason at all that a flute can’t be used as a percussion instrument.

      • Richard Hershberger

        Flutes are expensive, and using them as percussion instruments is likely to dent them.

      • Vance Maverick

        I think that’s a fair description of how it’s used musically in salsa (if I have my Latin music terms right) — spiky attacks on/around/against the beat.

        Its use here (at least in the first 10 seconds) seems like the sort of thing actual hip-hop can quote or otherwise bracket just fine.

    • marduk

      Even out of touch elderly Frank Sinatra listeners should remember Flute Loop.

    • matt w

      Snoop Doggy Dogg’s “Tha Shiznit” has a memorable flute part, which I recently learned is a musical quotation of Billy Joel’s “The Stranger.” That was the best thing I learned that day.

    • wca

      Is there Rap Didgeridoo? Because I would pay to hear that.

      If not, Rap Alphorn would do.

      • Lee Rudolph

        If not, Rap Alphorn would do.

        Also a great porn name.

      • TheSophist

        You have not lived until you’ve seen a trio of Alpenhorns street busking (to increase the wonderfulness, ’twas on the steps of the Dom in Cologne.) My friend and I christened them “The Apocalyptica of the Alpenhorn”. You also have not lived until you’ve heard Apocalyptica.

        • rea

          Apocalyptica

          The Suomi all-cello Metallica cover ban?
          (truth being stranger than fiction . . .)

          • TheSophist

            Yup, that Apocalyptica. Saw them this spring – great fun.

        • You do not say whether they were performing Apocalypso.

        • a trio of Alpenhorns street busking

          Last year I listened to a Bavarian oompahpah band performing a medley of James Bond theme music. This was at a bierfest in Genoa.

        • Lee Rudolph

          You have not lived until you’ve seen a trio of Alpenhorns street busking (to increase the wonderfulness, ’twas on the steps of the Dom in Cologne.)

          I once saw a gaggle of Alpenhorn players (more than 3) performing in a public place (but probably not busking) in the Netherlands, which increased not the wonderfulness but the surreality.

          On the other hand, I also saw and heard a single carbon-fiber Alpenhorn being played by a roboticist in Zurich; being carbon-fiber, it was light enough for him to hoist the bell well off the floor, which was wonderful in its way.

    • cackalacka

      After JBs and P-Funk, Bobbi Humphrey might be the most sampled musician. Though I stopped listening to rap several decades ago so take it with a grain of salt.

    • njorl

      That’s an answer to a Celtic riddle – something about the music from a harp with no strings and a flute with no holes. The music was produced by rapping the flute against the different edges of the harp to make different notes.

  • Mac the Knife

    I’m not going to watch this, but I assume it’s “off the hook” and brings the GOP into “urban-suburban hip hop settings” like the prophet Michael Steele foretold.

    • Mac the Knife

      The period between Obama’s election and the beginning of the tea party, where the GOP briefly looked into strategies other than doubling down, has to go down as one of the most hilarious times in American history

      • Ahuitzotl

        certainly one of the shortest

        • Mac the Knife

          A couple months, right?

          But, any couple month-long period that features Michelle Bachmann’s “you be da man” quip at CPAC and the flopsweat-drenched antics of Michael Steele as he was shoved onto center stage and told to make the GOP hip (didn’t he have a section of the RNC website with some ridiculous slang title?) deserves an outsize place in that discussion.

          • Michelle Bachmann’s “you be da man”

            Maybe she was on one of her homophobic rants and meant to say “You bed a man…”

            • keta

              I thought it was her catechismic admonishment to Marcus.

      • CrunchyFrog

        You mean the period from June to November, 2008, right?

        Oh, I know, the official story is that the Tea Party began as an ad hoc thing due to a rant by Rick Santelli on CNBC that went viral in reaction to all of the horrible stuff Obama was doing early in his first term. But the tea party web site domains were registered the summer before. And most of the things they accuse Obama of doing never actually happened, but were theorized the summer before his election because, after all, giving free money away to black brothas in the hood was what black politicians do, amirite?

        This whole thing was planned long before it happened.

        • Mac the Knife

          You are correct. I am going by a conventional wisdom account of things and paying attention to the actions of the mouthpieces rather than actual goings on behind the scenes.

          Your way is a better way to understand the world. My way is a better way to understand that specific clown show.

          • cpinva

            “My way is a better way to understand that specific clown show.”

            I understand it as being similar to that high pitched sound your lawnmower makes, just before it uses up the last fumes of gas in the tank and dies.

      • Mac the Knife

        I didn’t mean to get anyone’s dander up by suggesting the GOP sincerely thought about reforming its policies after the 2008 election. My post should have stipulated “rhetorical strategies other than doubling down”

    • Halloween Jack

      Would that also be “fly”? Or is it “fleek”? Sorry, I dropped my stack of index cards and they’re all mixed up now. One might even term the situation “wrekt”, no, “crunk”… damnit.

    • ThrottleJockey

      Michael Steele, lol, that brotha actually had some dap. Ben Carson’s from Maryland, too, but not so much. LOL.

      That ad actually reminded me of those horrible rap ads we saw in the ’80s which looked like cheap caricatures of cheap caricatures.

  • Cheerful

    I think from a proper distance present times would also qualify as pretty hilarious, though proper distance would need to be New Zealand or perhaps a self-sustaining colony on Mars.

    • Mac the Knife

      I’m sure I’m overlooking plenty by putting it this way, but in the afterglow of the ’08 election, there was at least some optimism going around. The bufoonishness of the likes of Michael Steele and Michelle Bachmann was funny in this light. Now, that same bufoonishness is being used to great effect, which is too scary to be amusing.

    • though proper distance would need to be New Zealand
      Works for me.

  • Denverite

    We can put to rest any debate about whether GOP outreach to African-Americans can ever be anything but dreadfully insulting and insultingly dreadful. Really, no one should have asked the question after the “GOP – The Party of Lincoln” ad.

    Silly women with their silly ladybrains. The GOP “outreach” efforts to African-Americans have always been about telling white people that they’re not racist for voting for Republicans. Always.

    Congrats on the guest gig!

  • Karen24

    For once the fact that I don’t really like rap works to my advantage. (I like melodic music, so rap, most heavy metal, and free-form 1950’s jazz aren’t to my taste. Rap is no worse or no better than other kinds of music, I simply don’t enjoy it.)

    • Karen24

      And if there is one place on Earth that popular music of any style does not belong it is a political ad, especially for conservatives. Conservatives are supposed to be stodgy; it’s in the word itself. Please please please please stop trying to be hip. It is agonizing to watch.

      • wca

        Conservatives are supposed to be stodgy; it’s in the word itself. Please please please please stop trying to be hip. It is agonizing to watch.

        Take it from me. It’s hip to be square.

        • Linnaeus

          Obligatory YouTube link.

        • DW

          “Is this just math that you do as Huey Lewis and the News to make yourself feel better?”

      • Ken

        Still, at least this time it’s original. There’s a fairly long list of political campaigns that have gotten into trouble for using music in their ads without bothering to get permission or pay royalties.

      • cpinva

        there should be no music at all in conservative political ads. any kind of music requires creativity (whether you like the particular style is irrelevant), a trait conservatives lack in abundance, by definition. and no, putting a cheap sheen on an old policy proposal isn’t creative, it’s just lazy and cheap.

    • ThrottleJockey

      You don’t have to justify why you don’t like rap, Karen, its ok, and we love you anyways.

      Although I love hip hop, the last decade or so its gotten increasingly hard to enjoy. There’s the melody problems you mention; the over reliance on sampling that limits innovation; and the dubious attempts to one up one another in lyrics. (We may have hit rock bottom lately with Post to Be which must have been meant as satire, though it unfortunately seems serious, as it includes the line “I might let your boy chaffeur me, but he gotta eat the booty like groceries.”)

      These days I seek solace in Chill Out music. (which can be very melodic :-)

  • wjts

    I’m simultaneously impressed and disappointed that the first lines weren’t “My name is Ben Carson and I’m here to say/Vote for me on Election Day”.

    • Gregor Sansa

      needz moar “you gotta” and/or “wiggity”.

    • medrawt

      I have experience fixing brains / And I know that taxes are a pain

      The Bible says Joseph built the pyramids* / Science says he didn’t, but I believe he did!

      (* No, it doesn’t)

      Ribbity rap a rap a rap-tastic.

      • wjts

        The idea that the pyramids were grain silos rather than tombs has been around since at least the Middle Ages (and possibly longer). The oldest reference I know is in the delightfully batshit 14th century book The Travels of Sir John Mandeville:

        …[N]ow I shall tell you about Joseph’s Barns, which still exist in Egypt beyond the River Nile towards the desert that is between Egypt and Africa. There are Joseph’s Barns which were made to keep corn in for the seven lean years which were foretold in the seven dead ears of wheat which King Pharaoh saw in a dream, as the first book of the Bible says. And they are made wonderfully cleverly of well-hewn stone. Two of them are marvelously high, and broad too; the remainder are not so big. Each one of them has a porch at the entrance. These same Barns are now full of snakes; and outside many writings in divers languages are to be seen. Some men say that they are the tombs of some great men in ancient times; but the common opinion is that they are the Barns of Joseph, and they find that in their chronicles. And truly, it is not likely that they are tombs, since they are empty inside and have porches and gates in front of them. And tombs ought not, in reason, to be so high.

        • Hogan

          “Joseph built granaries of wonderful workmanship made of square stones and cement. They are constructed in such a way that they are very broad at the base but narrow at the top, so that corn could be poured into them through a small aperture. These granaries are still to be seen to this day.” – Gregory of Tours (d 594 A.D.), History of the Franks

          (Not sure what Frank has to do with this.)

          • wjts

            (Not sure what Frank has to do with this.)

            Joseph built the pyramids; his buddy Frank carved the Sphinx. Kircher explains this in Oedipus Aegyptiacus, somewhere towards the back.

            • The pyramids have evidently settled a lot even since Kircher’s 1676 depiction, so it’s perfectly plausible that they had much more empty space inside when originally constructed.

            • ThrottleJockey

              Wait, Frank carved the Sphinx, I thought the invented hot dogs???

              • wjts

                He was a talented fellow, Frank was.

          • ʾAbū l-Walīd Muḥammad Ibn ʾAḥmad Ibn Rušd

            (Not sure what Frank has to do with this.)

            I do not know why I even bother to speak to you lot.

            • Bother?

              Or deign?

              Semi-inquiring minds want to know…

        • medrawt

          Oh yeah, I know Carson didn’t invent the idea. It’s just out of date, since, you know, we’ve gone inside them and found mummified bodies, and also deciphered heiroglyphics, and conveniently there are hieroglyphics telling us exactly what the pyramids are for. The very little particular thing I find hilarious is that he made a point of talking about the chambers being hermetically sealed, and why would you need that if you weren’t trying to store grain, because the mummification process is totally impervious to environmental conditions.

          Writ broad, it’s like him talking about evolution, unaware that he can walk into the Smithsonian and see exactly what he says doesn’t exist. There are people who, wittingly or not, devote their lives to sophistry and obfuscation to try and refute straightforward empirical knowledge, but that’s not Carson. He’s swallowed the most easily, casually disprovable ideas and thinks they’re knockout blows because it’s never occurred to him to investigate the territory.

          • Hogan

            Tweet from Jacquelyn Gill:

            Ben Carson thinks the pyramids were used to store grain, not buried rulers. 1) pyramids aren’t hollow, and 2) ancient Egyptians could write.

          • Just_Dropping_By

            It’s just out of date, since, you know, we’ve gone inside them and found mummified bodies

            Carson’s a lunatic, but you’re partially wrong on that point — at Giza, no mummies have been found inside the pyramids of either Khufu or Khafre, rather only in the pyramid of Menkaure. It’s presumed that Khufu and Khafre’s remains were removed and reburied after their pyramids were plundered in ancient times, but that’s Occam’s razor, not something that’s actually documented from historical sources.

            • ThrottleJockey

              Now I’m really confused, first I learn that Frank carved the Sphinx instead of inventing hot dogs, and now I find that Occam lost his razor in a pyramid even though he was born 3,000 years after Djoser. I’m soooo lost.

  • matt w

    As someone who listened to Trevor Bauer’s rap (“You hide behind a mask to facilitate a task”) all the way through at least three times, I am uniquely qualified to compare and contrast the two.

    What? What did I just say? Just because I’m uniquely qualified doesn’t mean I want to! NO STOP YOU CAN’T MAKE ME NOOOOOOO….

    • wca

      Every once in a while, the universe reminds you that there actually are people who like repeatedly bashing their heads against walls. :)

    • jon98101

      This might be the worst attempt to co-opt rap since Ice Cube waxed poetic about making “ya jimmy thicka”

  • Dr. Ronnie James, DO

    Carson’s surely got the black conservative vote now. The hard part will be making sure Tim remembers to ask for time off to vote.

  • pillsy

    oh sweet jesus

  • joe from Lowell

    Next up:

    Wocka-wocka-wocka-wocka “My name is JEB! and I’m here to say…”

  • DrDick

    All conservative efforts to be hip and relevant are pretty cringe worthy, but this is absolutely pathetic.

    • cpinva

      “All conservative efforts to be hip and relevant are pretty cringe worthy, but this is absolutely pathetic.”

      they are crimes against nature, and should be severely punished.

  • Murc

    We can put to rest any debate about whether GOP outreach to African-Americans can ever be anything but dreadfully insulting and insultingly dreadful.

    The GOP have fallen into a typical trap about doing voter outreach that isn’t unique to them but afflicts them more heavily because of their epistemic closure; thinking that all you need to get people from certain sections of society who aren’t currently with you to be with you are to learn their cultural shibboleths and then use them. To “speak to them in their language,” like you’re cracking a code or a safe.

    And it really doesn’t work that way, because while the electorate is pretty shit-stupid, they’re not that kind of shit-stupid. There’s a lot to be said about being able to connect to people on a personal level that says “hey, I’m one of you” but that kind of thing is really hard to either fake or do naturally; people can usually tell. It’s like when a Democratic politician from an upper-class background tosses on a hoodie and shows up to a Nascar race, everyone knows he’s faking it.

    And even if you pull it off (Bill Clinton was famously great at that, he was a genuine Bubba from the sticks but could also walk into a room full of Nobelists and instantly blend in) it doesn’t have the return you think it will. People aren’t just waiting for you to speak the magic word before they’ll vote for you, which is what a lot of highly-paid professionals seem to think “voter outreach” means. People have real, actual needs and wants from the political process and they look for people who are going to fulfill them. Voter outreach is a long, grinding struggle of you demonstrating, repeatedly and over the course of many years, that you and your political party understand those needs and are willing to deliver on them, or at least fight strongly.

    This is why GOP voter outreach to blacks and hispanics is going to draw dead for the forseeable future, because the GOP has no interest at all in meeting the genuine needs of those groups, so the needle just won’t move. On the other side of the aisle, the Democratics just aren’t going to make strong inroads amongst white men in the south; they’ve decided that their overwhelming need is “put the boot into brown people” and that overrides anything else we could possibly offer them.

    • Lee Rudolph

      like you’re cracking a code or a safe

      rather than the shell of a rotten egg.

    • Rob in CT

      Well-put.

    • This analysis is incomplete and the comparison to Democratic efforts simply doesn’t work. You’re missing the fact that outside of the occasional official statement, calling someone the real racist, or 60-second ad buy, the GOP is openly and actively hostile to African-Americans and Hispanics.

      Really, if the GOP simply ignored minority groups save during election cycles, the party would do much better with both groups. So it isn’t that they’re trying to be “hip” or show that they’re “just like us.” That’s annoying and can slop into obnoxious, but it isn’t alarming.

      What they instead say is “Even though we spend our time calling you lazy, violent, stupid, parasites, telling our (heavily armed) voters to hate you and scaring the hell out of you with comments that strongly hint of a desire to see you all put away or down, you should vote for us. If you’re in a state where we haven’t made that difficult or impossible to do so.”

      As for trying to (or pretending to care about) meeting the needs of minority groups. The GOP is the group that creates those needs. What can they say to Hispanics or blacks – that won’t immediately enrage the Base?

      On the other side of the aisle, the Democratics just aren’t going to make strong inroads amongst white men in the south; they’ve decided that their overwhelming need is “put the boot into brown people” and that overrides anything else we could possibly offer them.

      But the decision of white men in the south to be hostile to the DNC because they’d prefer a party that provides their RDA of hate is the exact opposite of what’s going on with the GOP and minorities. And the Democrats do at least focus on things like fair wages and worker protections.

      • What can [the GOP] say to Hispanics or blacks – that won’t immediately enrage the Base?

        Arbeit Macht Frei.

      • Murc

        This analysis is incomplete and the comparison to Democratic efforts simply doesn’t work.

        How not? There seem to be a surfeit of Democratic consultants and pundits who believe that the party can win back white southern males without actually doing anything substantive to address their high-priority needs. That seems exactly comparable to the Republican consultants who think that they can win large swathes of the latino vote without doing anything at all to address their needs.

        (I am using ‘needs’ here as shorthand for ‘what those groups think they need.’ Southern white men don’t actually need to live in a racist apartheid state; that’s a want, not a need. But from their perspective it is a need.)

        You’re missing the fact that outside of the occasional official statement, calling someone the real racist, or 60-second ad buy, the GOP is openly and actively hostile to African-Americans and Hispanics.

        I don’t think I’m missing it at all, although you do have a point about my analysis being incomplete without addressing that more. It is true that the open hostility of the GOP to African-Americans and Hispanics is part of the problem their efforts to reach out to those voting groups is problematic. The GOP would very much like those large and growing segments of the American population to vote for them! Just, you know, while also despising them.

        They have the same problem with women.

        As for trying to (or pretending to care about) meeting the needs of minority groups. The GOP is the group that creates those needs. What can they say to Hispanics or blacks – that won’t immediately enrage the Base?

        Again, this is one of those things that makes doing outreach, real outreach, much harder for them than for Democrats.

        But the decision of white men in the south to be hostile to the DNC because they’d prefer a party that provides their RDA of hate is the exact opposite of what’s going on with the GOP and minorities.

        Yeah, but they operate under the same basic dynamic; the Democratic Party doesn’t meet their needs and is unwilling to do so, whereas the GOP is enthusiastic about it. The GOP is unwilling to meet the needs of minorities, is unwilling to do so, and actively hates them, whereas the Democrats are at least semi-enthusiastic about it.

        The active, virulent hate of the GOP is a contributing, aggravating variable, but it does not by itself flip things around completely.

        And the Democrats do at least focus on things like fair wages and worker protections.

        Which makes their job at reaching out to groups that don’t like them comparatively easier than the GOPs, but only comparatively. Fair wages, worker protections, not being poisoned by the air and water… lots of people care about those, but given the choice between those things and getting their sweet, sweet hate fix, they’ll pick the hate fix. Every time. They won’t even need to think about it.

        • Yeah, but they operate under the same basic dynamic; the Democratic Party doesn’t meet their needs and is unwilling to do so, whereas the GOP is enthusiastic about it.

          What needs of the white male southern base is the GOP meeting?

          Jobs? No.
          Health care? No.
          Workplace protections? No.
          Financial security of any sort? Pfffbbbbt.

          The GOP is good at giving them two things the GOP and its predecessors trained them to want:

          Easier access to firearms.
          Validation of the assorted hates and fears.

          • Murc

            What needs of the white male southern base is the GOP meeting?

            I again quote myself:

            I am using ‘needs’ here as shorthand for ‘what those groups think they need.’ Southern white men don’t actually need to live in a racist apartheid state; that’s a want, not a need. But from their perspective it is a need.

            You are absolutely correct that wanting to live in a racist apartheid state is not in fact a genuine need; that’s a want. But from their perspective it is a need that has to be met. It’s the need, the one that trumps all others.

            The GOP is good at giving them two things the GOP and its predecessors trained them to want:

            Wanting to live in a society where they are the supreme racial group to which all others are subordinate isn’t something the GOP had to train them to want; many people wanted it anyway. That’s hardly a unique situation to our nation.

            But even accepting this premise… suppose the GOP trained them to want that stuff. Okay. Now they do want it. That means that anyone not fulfilling that want has a tough row to hoe.

    • mds

      This is why GOP voter outreach to blacks and hispanics is going to draw dead for the forseeable future, because the GOP has no interest at all in meeting the genuine needs of those groups, so the needle just won’t move.

      Yeah, but Quinnipiac has Ben Carson getting nineteen percent of the black vote against Clinton. Nineteen percent. Because he speaks socially-conservative religious black language just fine … as long as the socially-conservative religious black people (1) aren’t paying any real attention yet, or (2) are completely batshit insane authoritarians like Alan Keyes or Ben Carson. But if you think the more African-American voters hear from Carson, the less enthusiastic they’ll be, well … Real Clear Politics aggregate polling twelve months before the election begs to differ.

    • Yeah. Well-put.

      Just as a point of comparison, suppose the Democratic Party and progressives decided they needed outreach to, say, the 8chan crowd. (How would this happen? I don’t know. It’s not that they really exist in such large numbers, or that they’re representative of a lot of people who don’t actively participate. It’s not that they have control over any portion of media, or commerce, etc. Maybe they just seem like useful tools.) This wouldn’t work, because the entire reason for those forums’ being is to counter (what they think of as) liberalism (and they’d realize pretty quickly that they were considered as tools).

      It isn’t a perfect comparison. It’s not that the Rs have no wish to “meet the needs of those groups.” That makes sense when they’re bringing in, maybe, libertarians, or evangelicals into a party that was mostly lockjaw mainstream Protestantism, or Jews who used to be Marxists but are disaffected from what they see as the left. It’s that it’s logically impossible for the Rs to massage their intentions enough to turn their position into plausible propaganda that would bring them into the tent. They would have to change their platform so radically it would be unrecognizable.

      • Murc

        It isn’t a perfect comparison. It’s not that the Rs have no wish to “meet the needs of those groups.” That makes sense when they’re bringing in, maybe, libertarians, or evangelicals into a party that was mostly lockjaw mainstream Protestantism, or Jews who used to be Marxists but are disaffected from what they see as the left. It’s that it’s logically impossible for the Rs to massage their intentions enough to turn their position into plausible propaganda that would bring them into the tent. They would have to change their platform so radically it would be unrecognizable.

        Yeah, Shakezula is right that my analysis is somewhat incomplete, but I do think I put my finger on something important.

        Like, I didn’t at all go into the fact that many members of political parties don’t just make decisions out of pure political maximization, but out of closely held ideological conviction. The GOP has a lot of professional political operatives who would really love to get a lot more of the black and hispanic vote, for example, but they also have a lot of people in it who regard their ideal vote share of both those groups as 0% as a matter of ideology.

        But I didn’t want to spend all day composing a lengthy essay on the subject. :)

    • while the electorate is pretty shit-stupid, they’re not that kind of shit-stupid. […] It’s like when a Democratic politician from an upper-class background tosses on a hoodie and shows up to a Nascar race, everyone knows he’s faking it.

      The same way everyone saw through GW Bush when he posed as a down-to-earth Texan farm-boy.

  • keta

    I blame MC Rove.

  • Grumpy

    The lyrics and message are terrible, but the instrumental backing is actually pretty good. I have no trouble imagining them being part of a catchy song. Who produced this? He’s got my vote.

  • rea

    Carson thinks he can rap but he raps like crap. He’s gotta shut his trap, make his lips don’t flap, maybe go take a nap . . . but please, don’t rap.

    • Murc

      FREESTYLE

    • wca

      He’ll leave a sponge up in yo brain
      Get to gigs on private plane
      Sell you golf ball with his name
      Push fake medicine for pain
      While this land go down the drain
      Cause the Congress is insane

  • wca

    So, anyone got a link to the lyrics of the ad, since I cannot listen to the thing at work?

  • Phbbbffft. You call that flute-playing? This is flute-playing.

  • Crusty

    My name is Carson and I’m here to say
    I hate high taxes, everyday

    The pyramids in Egypt were built for grain
    supplement companies, I shill for gain

    Standing in a Popeye’s, some guy got rude
    I said hey man, go shoot some other dude

    At pediatric neurosurgery, I am the best
    But as a candidate, I speak slower than the rest

    Obamacare is worse than slavery and the holocaust combined,
    sure, sounds crazy, but look at the polls, bitches
    the nomination will be mine!

    • wengler

      *drops the mic*

      • The Temporary Name

        Not before dropping the science. No really, dropping it.

  • weirdnoise

    I sense a possible successor to rickrolling…

    • BruceFromOhio

      …was just about to comment same…

  • Tybalt

    I didn’t think it was that bad. Better than your garden-variety politician radio ad.

  • You guys! Carson invented a new music form…the Bubble Rap!

  • Julia Grey

    Fairly lively background music and beat, but meanwhile some half-dead guy is endlessly monotoning some wha? in the foreground.

    Do not get.

    • Are you talking about the song or Carson’s stump speech?

  • matt w

    You’ll cowards don’t even smoke Ben Carson

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