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How the Sausage Gets Made

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LGM has received exclusive tapes of a recent dialogue among two of the Maoists who have long edited the Styles and Real Estate sections of the New York Times. An excerpt is below:

Ms. Cohen’s piece is excellent. It starts off with the heart-rending tale of a young couple complaining about having to leave “the city” to live in a densely populated urban area with many fine restaurants, bars, shops, and live music venues a 10-minute subway ride from Union Square. It then discusses the couple strategizing about how to purchase a $1.5 million apartment, something anyone could identify with.”

“Excellent, comrade. This will surely hasten the revolution. But wait a minute — maybe they earned their money as oncologists or something?”

“He’s a ‘business consultant for consumer goods’ and she’s a ‘user experience designer.'”

“A little on-the-nose, perhaps? Couldn’t we give them something that at least sounds like a real job?”

“Nah, it’s New York in 2015. I think it works, comrade.”

“Well, at least we could use some visual support for the piece. Could the wealthy hipster look a little more smug in the photo?”

“We’ll use photoshop if we have to. Does he have a wine decanter?”

“Of course. It will be perfect.”

“Fine. Now, let’s get to work on that piece how marginal tax rates should be cut so that middle-class people aren’t priced out of $160,000 wine cellars.

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