Tuesday Morning Kink

This thread went past the 400-comment mark, so some of you may have missed the comment where LGM frequenter, Karen, nonchalantly admitted she had read all five parts of John C. Wright’s plea to take that goddamn bow out of Katniss Everdeen’s hands. Now, folks, I confess I’m a little worried about our Karen, because that is some hardcore masochistic reading-kink and I’m not sure she has the proper tools and training to handle that sort of thing. What’s more, she’s gone on to even more dangerous kink. I’m worried about Karen, folks…is what I’m saying. No, but really, this is a thing of beauty:

As a young female teenager occupying a place in modern society, I understand when I hear it said that feminism is no longer viable.

I understand when I see that I have to wear tiny skirts and publicly visible underwear to reclaim my sexuality. I understand a song tells me that I am beautiful [if I dance like a stripper]. I understand when I see women stuffed into business suits, irritably peeling the clinging fingers of their wailing children from their pinstriped skirts and ushering them into the waiting arms of daycare staff. I understand when I see the empty home, the shattered marriage, the children eating canned soup alone because Mommy is working late. I understand when I see the downtrodden man. I understand when I sit in an empty pew on Sunday morning.

I understand when I’m told that I may care for children….as long as they are not my own. I understand when I’m told that I may clean home….as long as it is not my own. I understand when I’m told that I may cook….as long as it’s not for MY family. I understand when I’m told I may intimately please my husband….as long as he’s paying. I understand that I may be whatever I want in life…as long as it’s not what I want. I understand when I’m told that I may be at peace….as long as that is during yoga classes at the company gym.

I understand when I watch a Slutwalk on TV. I understand when I see abortion clinics. I understand when I see modern art. I understand when I see someone from behind, and cannot guess what gender they are. I understand when I see a mother in a soldier’s uniform reunited with the child she hasn’t seen in over 6 months. I understand when see pornography on late night TV. I understand when I hear that it no longer takes a man and a woman to conceive a child. I understand when I see all-girl football teams.

I understand when I see motherhood mean nothing. I understand when I see love as a text message. I understand when I see free condoms for 13 year olds. I understand when I see dignity as a fishnet shirt and a smug placard. I understand when I see a single father. I understand when I see two women on top of a wedding cake.

I understand that feminism has no place in my life.

Feminists: is there nothing we can’t ruin? You know what I heard about feminists? They broke up The Beatles. And they’re the cause of climate change. HA HA, JUST KIDDING. CLIMATE CHANGE DOESN’T EXIST, LIBTARDS.

The punchline is the title: A Student Denounces Feminism — and Receives a Bad Grade

Maybe because the essay is a complete misapprehension of feminism and includes no citations to back up its assertions? Maybe?

If you’re really in the mood for a hard spank and a mouthful of ball-gag, please take a gander at the Klan member trolling Roy’s column on The Knockout Game.

YOU’RE WELCOME!