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Death List 2013

[ 31 ] January 1, 2013 |

Another year, another death list.

1. Manoel de Oliviera
2. Joan Fontaine
3. Billy Graham
4. Helen Thomas
5. George Shultz
6. Clark Terry
7. Little Jimmy Dickens
8. Nancy Reagan
9. Luis Echeverria
10. Bob Barker

The passing of Mike Wallace, Ernest Borgnine, Phyllis Diller, and Sun Myung Moon opened 4 spots on this year’s list, but then I also made some additional changes to move people along who weren’t really that aged.

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  • Amanda in the South Bay

    You better indicate that its a metaphorical death list.

    • John

      Liberal professor calls for murder of Bob Barker!

      • Did I mention my association with the Puppy Farms of America?

        • Barry Freed

          Is their death sufficient or must their heads be suitably mounted?

    • Incontinentia Buttocks

      In the interest of accuracy, this is a literal death list. Erik is actually predicting their deaths. I suppose it could also be read as a metaphorical hit list, but I don’t even see any metaphorical calling-for-murder going on here.

    • CD

      But fully approved by the Trustees of the University of Rhode Island

  • waverby

    Not putting Bush I in the pool?

  • Joe

    Time to rent that Clint Eastwood movie.

  • Bobbo

    Wow, didn’t realize Joan Fontaine was alive. Checked Wikipedia and so is older sister Olivia deHavilland.

  • Randy Paul

    I think you should also include Hugo Chavez to boost your average. Doesn’t look good for him . . .

    • efgoldman

      Beat me to it. Either he’s very close, according to this morning’s reports, or its all an elaborate ruse, and a “miracle” is coming.

  • Thom

    I think Nelson Mandela should make the list. (And note that I work at a desk under his portrait.)

    • Even I have some moral standards!

      • Thom

        I’m not saying I want his head on a stick…

  • Suetonius

    Margaret Thatcher. And I’ll even throw in the stick gratis if it happens.

    • Barry Freed

      Damn that was me.

    • wengler

      Optimist.

    • Warren Terra

      Byron on Castlereagh comes to mind …

  • efgoldman

    I noticed you took Fidel off of last year’s list. Have you decided he’s immortal?

    • He’s not as old as any of the people on the list I put together this year. Just not a good enough bet. I also took off Thatcher and the king of Thailand.

  • wengler

    Lindsay Lohan just isn’t that popular anymore.

    • Origami Isopod

      Speaking of which, shouldn’t there be at least one wild card along the lines of Lohan/Winehouse? I propose Charlie Sheen.

  • Eventually Vo Nguyen Giap is going to have to pass on. I know people have been saying that for decades. But, nobody lives forever. The man is over 100 now.

  • Clark Terry just turned 92. Clearly his health is poor, but he aint giving up.

    http://clarkterry.com/#/2012/12/happy-new-year-2013/

    • Terry has been on the list the longest. In fact, he was on my very first list 6 or 7 years ago. I hope he stays another 7 years.

  • This ghoulish shit brings the whole blog down.

    • owlbear1

      I enjoy it as a lesson in impermanence myself. Speculation on the deaths of famous people reminds us all of of our own mortality.

    • Origami Isopod

      Thank you for your concern.

    • I too am outraged by century-old conventions of black humor.

  • ruviana

    I noticed you took Zsa Zsa off the list–figure she’ll go on forever?