Crime scene
Knoxville police announced this afternoon that a badly beaten rhetorical device, believed to be that of Irony, was found in a dumpster behind the University of Tennessee Law School. Police Commissioner Eric Blair described the scene as “one of the worst cases of its kind I’ve ever seen,” and promised that “heads would roll” once the responsible parties were identified.
Members of the public with any relevant information are encouraged to call a special tip line set up by authorities.
Vertov:
December 19th, 2012 at 6:39 pm
They need to focus like a laser beam on the perpetrator. (DISCLAIMER: not a literal laser beam).
Rob:
December 19th, 2012 at 6:40 pm
Well then you should really put up this
Rob:
December 19th, 2012 at 6:41 pm
Or you know, this:
http://youtu.be/8uaaF83eVig
Bitter Scribe:
December 19th, 2012 at 6:44 pm
“What is the gun community going to do about this tragedy?”/”I dunno. What is the gay community going to do about Penn State?”
I’m not gay, but I can guess: Call you a fucking idiotic asshole for conflating child abuse with homosexuality.
Scott S.:
December 19th, 2012 at 6:46 pm
TOO LATE, COPS ARE COMIN
Left Outside:
December 19th, 2012 at 6:49 pm
Wow.
Wow.
What a cunt.
xxy:
December 19th, 2012 at 6:55 pm
Why would Glenn Reynolds fake outrage to defend the NRA, the perpetrators of a policy that massacred 20 American schoolchildren? Does Glenn Reynolds love guns more than the 20 American schoolchildren massacred by NRA policy? Or does he enjoy hearing news of 20 American schoolchildren being massacred by a system of firearms law practically written by the NRA? Does Glenn Reynolds just enjoy massacres of schoolchildren in general? Does he hate America?
It would be irresponsible not to speculate!
Tehanu:
December 19th, 2012 at 6:56 pm
Police Commissioner Eric Blair described the scene as “one of the worst cases of its kind I’ve ever seen,” and promised that “heads would roll” and be stuck on sticks.
FTFY
Rob:
December 19th, 2012 at 6:59 pm
Reynolds is objectively pro child killer.
John Protevi:
December 19th, 2012 at 7:05 pm
I see what you did there
Clark:
December 19th, 2012 at 7:24 pm
I witnessed the whole thing. The perp kept repeating “heh” and “indeed” and something about being affiliated with the Amazon.
mark f:
December 19th, 2012 at 7:27 pm
Hahahahahahah, what a piece of shit.
Kurzleg:
December 19th, 2012 at 7:30 pm
This is ok, but I think they left out “Big Bottom”.
herr doktor bimler:
December 19th, 2012 at 7:44 pm
call a special tip line set up by authorities.
I hope the case will someday come to a Trial.
wengler:
December 19th, 2012 at 7:45 pm
State fair rules: It isn’t a thing until it’s stuck on a stick.
somethingblue:
December 19th, 2012 at 7:47 pm
Certainly not. This is Amerika!
arguingwithsignposts:
December 19th, 2012 at 7:51 pm
Maybe the tip line is run out of this airport.
The Fool:
December 19th, 2012 at 8:06 pm
I think that’s the point: the gun community doesn’t have anything to do with the tragedy.
Linking people who like guns with mass murderers because they used guns to commit the murder is as ‘obviously’ stupid as linking the gay community to pedophiles because the children those pedophiles targeted were male (ignoring that many people did/do exactly that).
At least, that’s the only way I can understand it that allows Althouse/Instapundit to smugly proclaim that those who get offended just don’t understand their subtle brilliance.
Major Kong:
December 19th, 2012 at 8:50 pm
Irony not only is dead, the body was run through an industrial wood-chipper Fargo style.
JazzBumpa:
December 19th, 2012 at 8:56 pm
Some guy killed his wife here in MI a few Winters back and did exactly that, spewing her remains all over a frozen lake.
The wood chipper, alas, retained mucho quantities of DNA evidence.
Malaclypse:
December 19th, 2012 at 9:26 pm
Further sodomizing Irony’s corpse, White Nationalist McCain is now saying everybody who signed the CT thread has “sign[ed] their own death warrants.”
Bill Murray:
December 19th, 2012 at 9:30 pm
talk about mud flaps my girl’s got ‘em
Eli Rabett:
December 19th, 2012 at 9:34 pm
Some might wish to join the party at the Providence Journal
Eli Rabett:
December 19th, 2012 at 9:38 pm
This is more interesting
Bitter Scribe:
December 19th, 2012 at 9:54 pm
You’re right, although something tells me Althouse and Instaputz have not been in the forefront of protesting the “pedophiles = gays” trope.
Jon H:
December 19th, 2012 at 11:10 pm
I hate to spoil the fun (partially), but the “heads rolling” post was by Michael Totten.
If Totten’s also gotten in on the head-sticking two-minutes hate, then nevermind.
caesaigh:
December 19th, 2012 at 11:37 pm
Geez, thanks. Rickrolled me over to InstaSmegma. 30 minutes of may life, wallowing in pinworms, that I’ll never get back.
caesaigh:
December 19th, 2012 at 11:38 pm
may, dammit, MY. Fuckity.swoof:
December 20th, 2012 at 12:18 am
There’s a lot of unhinged stupid in that comment thread.
K:
December 20th, 2012 at 1:29 am
So do I
Bill Murray:
December 20th, 2012 at 1:30 am
That’s how Paul Rudd wants to kill Judd Apatow’s wife in Apatow’s new film.
Brutusettu:
December 20th, 2012 at 4:29 am
Now he wants to make us all blind!!!11 Why haven’t they fired the man yet!!1
herr doktor bimler:
December 20th, 2012 at 4:33 am
Damn. I really should pay more attention to my paperwork.
herr doktor bimler:
December 20th, 2012 at 4:34 am
And as a
visually-impairedone-eyed man, I will then be king! Bwah-hah-hah!!c u n d gulag:
December 20th, 2012 at 6:54 am
Yes, very “Blairian.”
RedSquareBear:
December 20th, 2012 at 8:09 am
At least here in Wisconsin we have a corollary (or is that “coronary”?) that it has to be deep fried and on a stick to be covered.
I think this is what they mean when they call states “laboratories of democracy”?
actor212:
December 20th, 2012 at 8:37 am
The perpetrators will be caught, tried and summarily executed….with votes.
actor212:
December 20th, 2012 at 8:39 am
To which the only possible response is “Oh, well!”
SEK:
December 20th, 2012 at 9:29 am
Good lord, this is Onion quality prose:
Steve LaBonne:
December 20th, 2012 at 9:47 am
As in pretty much every online newspaper comment thread I’ve ever seen. Perhaps some sociologist should look into that phenomenon.
Joseph Slater:
December 20th, 2012 at 9:49 am
How could I leave her behind?