Home / General / The gift that keeps on giving…

The gift that keeps on giving…


Holy shit, can this presidential campaign please go on forever? Please don’t ever stop, Mitt. Please.

Meantime, Willard should take Bing Crosby’s lead and prove he’s really an heir to the Party of Lincoln.

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  • Spencer W Kimball, Prophet, Seer, and Revelator

    “The day of the Lamanites is nigh. For years they have been growing delightsome, and they are now becoming white and delightsome, as they were promised. In this picture of the twenty Lamanite missionaries, fifteen of the twenty were as light as Anglos; five were darker but equally delightsome. The children in the home placement program in Utah are often lighter than their brothers and sisters in the hogans on the reservation…. At one meeting a father and mother and their sixteen-year-old daughter were present, the little member girl-sixteen sitting between the dark father and mother, and it was evident she was several shades lighter than her parents on the same reservation, in the same Hogan, subject to the same sun and wind and weather. There was the doctor in a Utah city who for two years had had an Indian boy in his home who stated that he was some shades lighter than the younger brother just coming into the program from the reservation. These young members of the Church are changing to whiteness and delightsomeness. One white elder jokingly said that he and his companion were donating blood regularly to the hospital in the hope that the process might be accelerated.”

    • Jameson Quinn

      Um, how much of this is real? None, right? Right???

      • Malaclypse

        All of it. That was from 1960. You should see the stuff from before they were trying to be respectable.

        • Cody

          People shan’t forget that not long ago Mormon’s were religiously anti-black.

    • Bitter Scribe

      Hey, I’m just glad he considered the 16-year-old a “little girl” and not a potential wife.

    • Brad DeLong

      To be fair, YHWH did come down and talk to SWK a couple of decades later–and convinced him that Black people did not have to turn white before they could become Mormon priests. And SWK then went out and said that he had been wrong…

  • blowback

    Seems to me this story would be better suited to The Onion.

    • njorl

      Sadly, much of reality is now better suited to The Onion.

      • Aaron B.


      • BigHank53

        Convergence! Wasn’t that a Web 2.0 buzzword?

        • thebewilderness

          No, it’s a quilt design.

  • I’m really not sure I can believe it. It’s just so crazy. Nothing that crazy could really happen, right?

    • njorl

      I think it could. They might have tried to brown him subtly, but done it in the wrong light. Then, when he gets under the brights, he looks ridiculous.

      Then again, it could just be normal incompetence in the Romney campaign – screwing up the make up without any ulterior motive. I remember George McGovern looking bright orange at one campaign event.

      • herr doktor bimler

        Too much carrot juice and vitamins.

        You’re orange, you moron! It’s one thing for you not to notice, but if your wife hasn’t picked up on the fact that her husband has changed colors, she’s just not paying attention.

      • BigHank53

        Makeup for TV is its own weird world. The lights are different in every studio, digital cameras pick up a different spectrum of light than the old tube cameras, HD cameras are even odder (and the higher resolution poses another challenge) and the Univision lighting setup may very well be significantly different from most US networks, since they have a lot more guests and staffers with significantly darker skin.

        The Romney campaign, however, should know this, and have enough experienced makeup people on board to deal with it. If they just went with the Univision staff…well, you take what you get.

  • If there were not IOKIYAR, someone would Edwards Willard and price the total cost of his Univision “haircut.”

    Probably 1%, to do a Bond joke.

  • It just has to be an overzealous makeup artist overcompensating. It has to be.

    • Warren Terra

      Or a Univision makeup artist being sarcastic?

      • poco

        I love this explanation.

  • DocAmazing

    Don Alejandro Jolson.

  • avoidswork

    Maybe he just got Boehner’d with a side of Snooki?

    Money Pander Boo Boo obviously enjoys driving/riding the RomenyShambles and has no derailment plans at the present time.

    And bless his heart.

  • wjts

    “Buenos dias, parásitos! Hoy, prometo un America nuevo, un America donde Ustedes serán liberos trabajar por menos que el salario mínimo hasta el día de sus muertes. Ustedes saben que digo la verdad, porque me parezco a Ustedes. ¿Por qué Ustedes se me miran de esa manera? Estoy usando el pronombre formal, parásitos!”

    • ck

      +un mil

    • Jameson Quinn

      Dos palabras. Ma, mon.

    • If Mitt Drank

      Thanks, but just another margarita.

  • herr doktor bimler

    I for one welcome the prospect of Mitt Romney wearing a luchador mask at his next public appearance.

  • Look out, there are llamas!

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