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Why Do All These Mud People Keep Calling Me Racist?

[ 157 ] April 6, 2012 |

The eminent Derb:

(10a) Avoid concentrations of blacks not all known to you personally.

(10b) Stay out of heavily black neighborhoods.

(10c) If planning a trip to a beach or amusement park at some date, find out whether it is likely to be swamped with blacks on that date (neglect of that one got me the closest I have ever gotten to death by gunshot).

(10d) Do not attend events likely to draw a lot of blacks.

(10e) If you are at some public event at which the number of blacks suddenly swells, leave as quickly as possible.

(10f) Do not settle in a district or municipality run by black politicians.

(10g) Before voting for a black politician, scrutinize his/her character much more carefully than you would a white.

(10h) Do not act the Good Samaritan to blacks in apparent distress, e.g., on the highway.

(10i) If accosted by a strange black in the street, smile and say something polite but keep moving.

Comments (157)

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  1. Postscript says:

    Holy wow… Go the link – the excerpt above actually makes Derbyshire look BETTER than the full version – once you get to points 11 and 12.

    The comments section is a real peach too. Just… wow.

    • Njorl says:

      I like to look for the best in people. Derb should be commended for being one of the few conservatives willing to speak his mind. If they had any guts, they’d be arguing that racism is good, like Derb here, not that they aren’t racists.

      I apoligize for being unfair. I’m sure many conservatives just hate poor people and don’t care about the color of their skin.

      • Steph says:

        Seriously. It’s what is so often implied, but with enough deniability (at least in some people’s minds) that “why do liberals keep calling me racist” is the diversion on the ready. Pretty shocking still, though. I guess I’m still naive.

      • Incontinentia Buttocks says:

        Derb certainly lacks the any sort of prudential filter. He’s simply willing to speak the right-wing id. See also his famous musings in defense of sexually desiring female children.

    • firefall says:

      noooo way. I once clicked through to the Derbywank, and it took me 3 weeks to feel clean afterwards. Never again!

    • Bijan Parsia says:

      11 and 12 were horrible.

      Also horrible that this is supposed to be, roughly, a guide to parenting. I.e., something to transmit to your children (“the talk”).

      Shocking to say the least. I guess it’s not surprising, but I do find it shocking. This is fairly mainstream, isn’t it?

      It is interesting how there’s all these “lots of variation, treat individuals as individuals…but STATISTICS TELLS US TO RUN” moves. I mean, this is supposed to help? “Oh no, I’m not racist. I just use statistics to support my fear of black people.”

      • I relate my hate towards blacks from life experience.Living in mixed neighborhoods you can see first hand how people live,how they treat each other,how they raise their children.How they treat people of other colors.I’m not happy with what I’ve learned.I would prefer to live in a world without them.

    • Linda says:

      At first, when I read it someplace else, I swear I thought it was somebody paraphrasing him for satire. But all the remarks are scary. For all the opinion pieces. There was one on the Hunger Games that said that all action pics starring women were impossible and horrible, and that the poster wished he could find one where the heroine got killed and, I swear, “that they would eat her flesh. just to make a point.” These peeps have more issues than the National Geographic.

  2. newsouthzach says:

    I’m pretty sure this is parody. Too over-the-top to be real.

    • Robert Farley says:

      I would be so happy if this were parody.

      • Spud says:

        Conservatives killed irony and sodomized its corpse years ago.

        I would have loved to consider this parody, but if you look at other things from Derb, its obvious, the guy is a full blown racist wackadoodle.

        Its all David Duke’s talking points with a better handle on basic grammar. Derb would have no problem posting on Stormfront.

        • efgoldman says:

          Its all David Duke’s talking points…

          But Duke, even now, is a marginalized crackpot. Why isn’t Derb in the same place?

          • Spud says:

            Why isn’t Derb in the same place?

            There are no photos of Derb in a hood and bedsheet. Its the same reason Pat Buchanan’s house doesn’t get T-P’ed all the time

            That’s about the only difference. Same crap. Slightly less retarded package.

          • Kyle Huckins says:

            Alas Duke is probably a moderate now, hence his consignment to the margins.

          • herr doktor bimler says:

            It seems that once Derbyshire became a made man in the wingnut-welfare complex, he could come out as a white supremacist and a pedophile, while his colleagues shake their heads in amused disapprobation. Being a white supremacist right from the start is apparently still a barrier.

          • Bill Murray says:

            Doesn’t the Derb sport a fine British accent? Racism sounds classier in a Home Counties brogue

            • herr doktor bimler says:

              No-one capable of debauching verbs to create a parenthetical clause like “neglect of that one got me the closest I have ever gotten to death by gunshot” would have received many invitations to garden parties in the Home Counties. No wonder he crossed the Atlantic.

    • Funkhauser says:

      I wondered if it was parody, but then saw articles by Steve Sailer and Pat Buchanan on the sidebar, along with an article entitled Trayvonnosaurus Rex.

      FSM, what an even worse Friday.

    • DrDick says:

      Nothing is too over the top for Derb. Especially when it comes to race.

      • firefall says:

        that is as nothing compared to the vile spew he emits about barely pubescent girls.

        • JW Mason says:

          No, they are equally vile.

        • Spud says:

          Pray tell what he has against pubescent girls.

          I would ask for a link, but I am both deeply afraid of what he has to say and do not want to draw the attention of the FBI and Dateline NBC.

          • Hogan says:

            Against them? Nothing at all. He loves them deeply. If you know what I mean, and I’m sure you wish you didn’t.

          • Bill Murray says:

            I think his rant against Chelsea Clinton in 2001 may count (21 probably isn’t barely pubescent though)

            “Chelsea is a Clinton. She bears the taint; and though not prosecutable in law, in custom and nature the taint cannot be ignored. All the great despotisms of the past — I’m not arguing for despotism as a principle, but they sure knew how to deal with potential trouble — recognized that the families of objectionable citizens were a continuing threat. In Stalin’s penal code it was a crime to be the wife or child of an “enemy of the people”. The Nazis used the same principle, which they called Sippenhaft, “clan liability”. In Imperial China, enemies of the state were punished “to the ninth degree”: that is, everyone in the offender’s own generation would be killed, and everyone related via four generations up, to the great-great-grandparents, and four generations down, to the great-great-grandchildren, would also be killed.”

            • Pupienus says:

              He really went on about Chelsea’s taint? That’s beyond disturbing.

              Also FYWP.

            • Anonytroll says:

              We’ll meet again, don’t know where, don’t know when,
              But I know we’ll meet again, some sunny day.
              Keep smiling through, just like you always do,
              ‘Til the blue skies drive the dark clouds far away. And by the way, I’m GAY.

          • Left_Wing_Fox says:

            Pray tell what he has against pubescent girls.

            His crotch.

    • Dirk Gently says:

      Whether or not it’s parody, you can take it to the bank that most of the commenters do not treat it as such.

      • R. Porrofatto says:

        Yeah, the comments are a joy. My girlfriend and I are white and have lived in NYC all our lives. We’ve lived in “heavily black” neighborhoods, worked in places “likely to draw a lot of blacks,” freely visited beaches and amusement parks “swamped with blacks” (god, what a disgusting phrase), acted as Good Samaritans to “blacks in apparent distress,” and we’ve even voted for black politicians. Amazingly enough, we managed to survive all of these terrors without once shitting our pants in Derb-like fear.

        I do know that if I had a 14 year-old daughter I’d be certain to tell her to beware of degenerate bigots who look and think like John fucking Derbyshire. Christ, what an asshole.

  3. Surreal American says:

    I’m amazed he didn’t say avoid movie theaters in black neighborhoods or you’ll never hear the film.

    Well maybe he did, but I aint getting out of the boat for Derb mangoes

  4. R Johnston says:

    Nigger, nigger, nigger.

    Lee Atwater is once again proven wrong.

  5. Hogan says:

    Actually if you substitute “Darbyshire” for “blacks,” the advice makes a lot of sense. Especially for adolescent girls.

  6. Derbyshire (by proxy) draws a lot of this recycled 19th century concept of racial stereotypes from Phillipe J Rushton, a douchebag which anyone familiar with the Pioneer Fund will know very well.

    Lynn, Jensen, Rushton, and even their opposite numbers in the “IQ is/is not hereditary” bar-fight going on in the pages of the Elsevier “journal” Intelligence (most of the leading figures in this backwater feud are on the editorial board of said journal) are mostly ignored by academia at large, because that crew wants to have the debate before trying to do things like come to a determination of what genes they’re looking at (rather than Rushton’s three “classic” races, which leave out huge swaths of the world’s population) and their odd ideas about evolution and intelligence.

    *spits nails*

    Sorry for rambling.

  7. DrDick says:

    And they wonder why we get concerned about the shooting of Trayvon Martin. No racism in America, no sirree.

  8. mark f says:

    William F. Buckley must be spinning in his grave.

    I mean, what with one of his writers saving his best material for other pages.

  9. J. Otto Pohl says:

    It appears that I am in daily violation of points 10a, 10b, 10f, 10i. The other points don’t come up daily so my violations are less frequent.

  10. rea says:

    Note, too, that the part of the Derbyshire article quoted in this post might be the least offensive part.

  11. Uncle Kvetch says:

    Why Do All These Mud People Keep Calling Me Racist?

    Would Derbyshire ever ask this question? He doesn’t strike me as the “just because I say [x] doesn’t make me a racist” type. More the “racist and damn proud of it” type.

  12. c u n d gulag says:

    Nope, no more racism after 2008!

    Derb’s rules can’t come close to Satchel Paige’s.

    But then, Satchel had a heart, and a brain.

    Hey Derb, if you find yourself in a black neighbor hood, ‘don’t look back – someone should be gaining on you!
    And I’ll be rooting for him!

    • Surreal American says:

      As a general rule, I try not to wish anyone (short of the worst of the worst) ill. However if grievous harm were to befall Derb, would it be ethically ok for me to wish him the slowest recovery possible?

      • BigHank53 says:

        Dude’s already stuck with being John Derbyshire, and it’s a life sentence.

      • rea says:

        If only Bruce Lee were still alive, to kick his ass again.

      • David Hunt says:

        However if grievous harm were to befall Derb, would it be ethically ok for me to wish him the slowest recovery possible?

        Up to now, I have been been blissfully ignorant the the Derb. My response to people like him who are cancers to the body-politic is to place them in my “Wouldn’t piss on them if they were on fire” category. I wouldn’t wish even this cyst on the butt of society harm but I’m not going on nanometer out of my way to give him any aid…ever.

        Of course the odds of my having any direct (or even indirect) power over the well-being of John Derbyshire are so miniscule that they don’t need to be considered. But having that category is useful form maintaining my own mental happiness.

      • Ian says:

        (10h) Do not act the Good Samaritan to John Derbyshire in apparent distress, e.g., on the highway.

  13. JW Mason says:

    Good god. No matter how bad you think it will be, it is worse.

    On the bright side, at least there aren’t any comments here saying, “But we can’t say for sure he’s a racist.”

    I wonder how many white Americans feel this way. One thing I learned working on various New York state local elections is that you can send white volunteers into black neighborhoods, no problem. There really are no issues at all. But there are white neighborhoods, in places like Nassau and Suffolk County, where it is just impossible for black people to knock on doors. The frequency of cops being called (and worse) is too high.

    • J. Otto Pohl says:

      I am guessing a lot. In the US the average history opening gets 200 applicants. We have 15 slots open and got four qualified applicants. I am quite sure the main thing limiting our applicant pool from the US is our location in Africa. A big part of the reason people don’t want to work in Africa is racism.

      • Holden Pattern says:

        That’s Ghana in Africa, right?

      • Andrew R. says:

        I don’t suppose they’re looking for someone who does medieval Europe, are they?

      • John says:

        This again? The big reason people don’t want to work in Africa is because it’s in Africa. You might have something if you could show that, say, a disproportionately low number of white people apply to jobs at historically black colleges in the US.

        • J. Otto Pohl says:

          Your tautology does not explain why people do not want to work in Africa. The main difference between working in Ghana and working in the UK or US as a history lecturer is that most of the people here are Black rather than White. There isn’t some geographic aspect of Africaness separate from the population that makes people prefer to work in majority White countries.

        • Barry Freed says:

          Hell, if I could get a decent job in Africa I’d relocate in a minute. I’ve lived in Morocco for a few years in the 90s but pretty much anywhere would be fine (areas of current or likely conflict excepted, naturally).

          • J. Otto Pohl says:

            There are lots more openings for history lecturers here than there are applicants. If you have a PhD in history from a legit institution you could easily get a job here.

            • Barry Freed says:

              MA in Religious Studies (specializing in Islamic studies) at an Ivy. I was doing a PhD there when I got ill and then divorced about a decade ago. I’m doing an MLS now with a certificate in archives and I’d love to go overseas with it but it doesn’t seem to be a degree that travels well.

    • N__B says:

      A lot of people who live on Long Island do so specifically because they (or their parents) fled NYC because they were scared of THOSE people.

      • Thlayli says:

        In my family’s case, the move from the ancestral homeland in Brooklyn to Queens did indeed have that motivation; while the later move out to Suffolk probably didn’t.

  14. laura says:

    Wait, I slept in this morning. What year is it?

  15. mark f says:

    (10c) If planning a trip to a beach or amusement park at some date, find out whether it is likely to be swamped with blacks on that date (neglect of that one got me the closest I have ever gotten to death by gunshot).

    Derbyshire gets off the Super Man ride at Six Flags and looks around. “Jeez,” he says, “this place is suddenly swamped with blacks.”

    He reaches into his interior breast pocket and removes an index card. “Ah, here it is. Rule (10e).”

    He gets into his car and just as he exits the lot he gives that shudder one gives when one thinks too much about coyotes while taking out the trash, only to find that one’s back feels at its most vulnerable a half-beat after realizing total safety.

    “I can’t believe I almost just got SHOT back there!”

    • DrDick says:

      The closest I ever came to being shot was in a couple of redneck dive bars in Oklahoma in my youth. Alcohol, meth, rednecks, and firearms are always a bad mix.

      • R Johnston says:

        My best friend and his wife ended huddled up in their bathtub one night because their alcoholic meth-addled redneck next door neighbor decided that shooting up a target on the side wall of his garage at 1AM sounded like a good idea and ended up putting a dozen bullets through my friend’s living room wall.

        • DrDick says:

          There are reasons I am glad I left 25 years ago, before the meth epidemic got so bad. Back then it was only in the redneck biker bars that you really had to worry about it.

          • Bill Murray says:

            when’s the meth epidemic scheduled to hit Montana?

            • DrDick says:

              About ten years ago, but there are a lot less people here, so they are easier to dodge, and I have learned to stay out of redneck biker bars. I also live in an island of sanity amidst the sea of rightwing crazy.

      • Chet Murthy says:

        Oh, right. yeah, there’s that, too. He mis-spelled “cracker rednecks” as “b-l-a-c-k”.

        Gosh, he’s never watched that documentary, _Deliverance_, I guess.

  16. Surreal American says:

    (10a) Avoid concentrations of blacks not all known to you personally.

    (10b) Stay out of heavily black neighborhoods.

    If only the above rules were followed the first time by those who normally defend the prerogatives of empire.

  17. Anonymous says:

    We’ll meet again, don’t know where, don’t know when,
    But I know we’ll meet again, some sunny day.
    Keep smiling through, just like you always do,
    ‘Til the blue skies drive the dark clouds far away.

    • sharculese says:

      because ‘ooga booga’ isn’t actually a thing you can debate against?

      • Surreal American says:

        “Never try to reason the prejudice out of a man. It was not reasoned into him, and cannot be reasoned out.”

    • Craigo says:

      So you actually read that swill, and you actually think the man who penned will respond to logic?

      If my dog shits on the carpet, I don’t lecture him about sanitation and proper manners. I whack his carpet-fouling rear end with a newspaper and toss him outside.

  18. Anderson says:

    Srsly, does NR still let him write for them?

  19. herr doktor bimler says:

    StealthBadger:

    Derbyshire (by proxy) draws a lot of this recycled 19th century concept of racial stereotypes from Phillipe J Rushton, a douchebag which anyone familiar with the Pioneer Fund will know very well.

    Rushton is worth a look, if anyone is bored with turning over flat stones to see what emerges. He argues that humans can have either large brains or large penises, but not both — apparently it’s a trade-off. Something to do with K / r reproduction strategies. And black guys are apparently less intelligent because they have bigger dicks… he puts it more-or-less in those words. I’m not sure why black women are also supposed to be less intelligent.

    His search for support for the “bigger dicks” thesis has led him to cite Penthouse Letters as serious evidence.

    Consequently, Rushton is praised in Derbyshire’s intellectual milieu for his fearless independence of thought and his willingness to follow the evidence in contravention to Political Soundness. IIRC, “The Bell Curve” rests heavily on Rushton’s oeuvre.

  20. Chet Murthy says:

    Teh funny. Derbyshire doesn’t know how to spell “white fratboy”. He spelled “b-l-a-c-k”.

  21. Anonymous says:

    We’ll meet again, don’t know where, don’t know when,
    But I know we’ll meet again, some sunny day.
    Keep smiling through, just like you always do,
    ‘Til the blue skies drive the dark clouds far away.

    • gocart mozart says:

      Link please.

      • Anonymous says:

        We’ll meet again, don’t know where, don’t know when,
        But I know we’ll meet again, some sunny day.
        Keep smiling through, just like you always do,
        ‘Til the blue skies drive the dark clouds far away.

        • Holden Pattern says:

          I am enjoying this method for troll-whacking. In keeping with the weather theme, how about some lyrics from “Somewhere Over The Rainbow”?

          Let’s make this guy a friend of Dorothy.

        • DocSavage says:

          You’d think Robert Farley would try to win in the arena of ideas, but suppression is always easier.

          That’s why despots always choose it.

      • Yes, his wife is Chinese and so his kids are mixed race. Which ought to work out well since he says that Asians are smarter than whites. Evidently ole Derb had his own little genetic experiment going on. All you need to know about his success is here.

        • Holden Pattern says:

          I think his wife would have married down, no matter who she was.

        • Linnaeus says:

          I find it interesting that those whites who subscribe to the “Asians are smarter than whites” never seem to wonder my Asian-Americans don’t run everything in this country, as their own reasoning would suggest should happen.

          • Linnaeus says:

            er, that’s “Asians are smarter than whites” thesis.

          • Andrew R. says:

            The “Asians are smarter” racists generally also believe that while whites might not be as clever as the cunning orientals, they’re more well-rounded, striking the perfect balance of the raw physicality of the black man and the excessive braininess of the mongoloid.

            (At least, that’s my read of them.)

        • burritoboy says:

          His daughter’s cute. Under the Derb’s own theories, is it acceptable for me to attempt to seduce her, or am I only allowed to do that if I’m a member of one of the superior races? I need guidance with this question, because I’m one of those Eastern European kikes, and I don’t quite know whether the Derb thinks we’re ubermenschen or dirty mud-people. Help!

      • Uncle Kvetch says:

        We’ll meet again, don’t know where, don’t know when [...]

        Link please.

        Beautiful.

    • DrDick says:

      I presume this means his wife is human?

    • DrDick says:

      Oooo. Looks like the landlords learned a new trick for dealing with our trolls. I like it.

  22. sharculese says:

    before i read blogs regularly, i once read prime obsession, derbyshire’s pop-math book on the reimann hypothesis, and enjoyed it.

    after i started reading blogs i tried for a long time to avoid reading anything he wrote in order not to ruin the image of him i had in my head. then i saw an excerpt from his piece on pubescent girls and i was like ‘welp, that’s over’

    • Bijan Parsia says:

      Is that where the Field’s medal thing came from? I thought that was oddly specific.

      • Robert.Farley says:

        We’ll meet again, don’t know where, don’t know when,
        But I know we’ll meet again, some sunny day.
        Keep smiling through, just like you always do,,
        ‘Til the blue skies drive the dark clouds far away.

  23. gocart mozart says:

    10a) Avoid concentrations of wingnuts not all known to you personally.

    (10b) Stay out of heavily wingnut infested comment sections.

    (10c) If planning a trip to a blog or website at some date, find out whether it is likely to be swamped with wingnut commentators on that date(neglect of that one got me the closest I have ever gotten to death by stupid.)

    (10d) Do not click on links likely to draw a lot of wingnuts.

    (10e) If you are at some blog at which the number of trolls suddenly swells, leave as quickly as possible.

    (10f) Do not settle in a blog or website run by conservative/Tea Party politicians.

    (10g) Before voting for a Tea Party politician, scrutinize his/her character much more carefully than you would a rational human being.

    (10h) Do not act the Good Samaritan to ‘conservatives” in apparent distress, e.g., on Talk Radio, or in the U.S. Senate, House, or Republican primaries.

    (10i) If accosted by a strange troll in the LGM comments, smile and say something polite but keep moving.

  24. Kyle Huckins says:

    The truly horrifying thought, this probably wasn’t the first draft. Imagine that little journey into Hell.

  25. Bijan Parsia says:

    To cleanse myself of Derbyfilth, I’m enjoying reading about Black mathematicians.

  26. vacuumslayer says:

    Is somebody screencapturing this shit?

  27. Kyle Huckins says:

    Am I the only one thinking that the b in his nickname used to actually be a P?

  28. Malaclypse says:

    Those are some really toxic mangos. Holy fuck.

  29. jim says:

    “Is somebody screencapturing this shit?”

    So one hopes, since I just get Teh Sexy Background Graphic O’ Doom from the link. Swamped addy or classic textbook case of DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING simplex?

  30. Sheetrock Bobby says:

    Seems like an Enoch Powell wannabe.

  31. [...] clicked a link on this post at Lawyers, Guns and Money (more Derbyshire comment at LGM here) and found this bat-shit [...]

  32. Eddie Dean says:

    We’ll meet again, don’t know where, don’t know when,
    But I know we’ll meet again, some sunny day.
    Keep smiling through, just like you always do,
    ‘Til the blue skies drive the dark clouds far away.

    • Spud says:

      Shorter Eddie Dean:

      How come they don’t take my claims of white supremacy seriously?


      Eddie, the reason why nobody gives a crap about minority on minority racism is that none of it ends up as national policy. There were never laws making white people chattel property. Blacks politicians haven’t lobbied to disenfranchise white and latino voters or take away social services to white people.

      Nobody ever considers “honkey” or “cracker” fighting words or terms meant to confer inferiority.

      The KKK used to run entire communities and send politicians to national office. The Black Panthers were “the gang which couldn’t shoot straight”. At best a relic of the 60′s. As relevant today as Wavy Gravy.

      Whites makes up the majority of the population and largest % of those in position of power. Their racist crap becomes law.

  33. Anonymous. says:

    We’ll meet again, don’t know where, don’t know when,,,
    But I know we’ll meet again, some sunny day.
    Keep smiling through, just like you always do,
    ‘Til the blue skies drive the dark clouds far away.

    • Spud says:

      It’s a long way to Tipperary,
      It’s a long way to go.
      It’s a long way to Tipperary
      To the sweetest girl I know!
      Goodbye, Piccadilly,
      Farewell, Leicester Square!
      It’s a long long way to Tipperary,
      But my heart’s right there.

  34. jim says:

    Give “blacks” a couple of thousands years being civilized and they won’t be so scarey violent murderous and stupid

  35. Babs says:

    Hey fucktard people call you racist cause you are.
    Please do the world a favor and kill yourself. You are a waste of air.

  36. [...] Why Do All These Mud People Keep Calling Me Racist? – Lawyers, Guns & Money : Lawyers, Guns &amp… __________________ What are Mitt's tax returns hiding? [...]

  37. [...] see Dawg, Elspeth Reeve, Josh Barro, John Holbo, Maureen O’Connor, Rob Farley, Scott Lemieux, Charles Johnson, and the readers of National Review who, contra Starburst [...]

  38. Anonymous says:

    What the hell is this some kind of joke because if it is i don’t get it and hardly anyone anymore is fully white so you need to jump off your high horse before your horse gets tired of carrying your enormous ego.

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